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A New Life in the Foreign Land

There was a girl, who born in a small village, where people give emphasis to son rather than a daughter. In that village, people thought that girls are only to eat and go to their husband home. It is worthless to invest money in their daughter’s education. But, there is also a family who love to have a daughter and think about their future. The daughter wants to change her community because of her thought she was selected in an international university with full scholarship in Bangladesh though she wasn’t strong in English. She had four younger sisters, a brother, a grandmother and parents in her family. Her mother had a heart problem so she couldn’t concentrate in her study.

She was weak in her study, so she was disappointed from her study. She didn’t want to continue her study, but she had no choice, and her teacher helped her to study. Finally, she loved reading and writing. One day from composition class, she had to write a life story so she wrote about her mother, family financial situation and the fact that she couldn’t concentrate in her study because of her mother situation. Some of the people who were working in her university were touched by her story and they decided to help her financially. They full finance a hotel and a hospital. Her mother heart operation was in Dhaka but she was in Chittagong. While she was studying at University, she rarely goes outside alone.

But the time came; she had to go Dhaka alone on a train. She was so scared in the train, because there was no any female in her compartment, and people were staring at her, like they met their enemy. While travelling she remembered some conversations with her teacher. The teacher was planning to go to Dhaka alone at midnight, therefore she asked her teacher about her travel. At that time the teacher told her, one day you’ll understand why you have to travel alone. She didn’t understand, but she was remembering all those words on the train. Finally she reached to Dhaka and one of her university staff, who was working in Dhaka branch, received her. That afternoon, she stayed in her friend home and receive her parents at 8pm from airport.

Then, they went to a hotel to stay, but after some days, they had to change the hotel for her mother surgery. She had to do all the procedures alone. The process and work wasn’t difficult but lack of language and people behavior towards her was a huge challenge. She couldn’t read even a single Bangla word however she can speak frequently. Once while she was searching Block B to test the blood, she met a group of three medical doctor students. She asked “Appu, Block B Kothey?” which means “Sister, Do you know where Block B is?” They scolded her saying that they were doctors not nurses and she didn’t know how to talk with the doctor. She was surprised. She told them sister because they were female not nurses. Finally, she found a Block B asking to some other people.

After a normal checkup, doctor suggested her to admit her mother in the hospital for surgery. She had never thought that she will have to face all those challenges in a foreign land. She was highlighted everywhere sometimes as a foreigner and a girl. She hated herself to be a white skin girl, because she became the victims of it. This is not a story of someone else but is my own story. Yes, it was me, only me. As a foreigner, some people cheated me in medical store by charging double amount of medicines. Once I asked GMG Airlines head office to a CNG driver for extending my parents ticket. I was told 2km and given a new address instead of 5minutes walk. I didn’t know, he was cheating me, so I took another CNG and go. Later When I reached there, I was told the same address from where I took the CNG. Moreover, As a daughter, I helped my parents, but people were asking me unnecessary questions. They didn’t understand the feelings of a daughter. But there was something in my mind. Why only son not a daughter? They were no any obligations from my parents, then why from others?

When I walked outside the hospital, some boys followed me and asked whether I am married or not? Also they asked my name and mobile number. Near the “PG hospital” there is no any good hotel so we had to eat in hospital canteen, but I also faced the same problem. Canteen worker always asked my number and marital status which made me embarrasses in front of people. To get ridge off them, I said that I was married though I am not. The days were passing so challengeable but hospital environment was good. Doctors and nurses gave a special care to my mother. Later, the doctor asked me to arrange 4 pounds of AB+ blood for my mother. I didn’t know AB+ is rear, so it was hard to find. From morning 9 am to midnight 12am, I was searching blood visiting Blood lab, talking with donor and some other people. Luckily, there was a book exhibition and we found three pounds blood from Quarantine Blood Lab. My father and one of the surgeons, who was also Nepali, helped to find three pounds blood but another problem occurs.

There was a fight between BDR and the Army. Hundreds of people suffered from this fight and there was a curfew on the street. We were not allowed to go outside for two days so the doctor cancelled the operation for a week. And I was told to cancel the reserved blood. I was so upset. After a week again I was request to arrange four pounds blood. I called to my university administration for help because I didn’t find AB+ blood from Blood Bank. All the staff tried to help me but none of their relatives had AB+. Finally, one of our madam Dilara, post an emergency blood need in face book. Many users replied the post and came to me. Only two people’s bloods were matched as AB+. Fortunately, with the help of my university staff’s friend, I got another donor.

I am very pleased to Asian university for Women for not only providing me a full scholarship but also providing my mother’s new life in a foreign land. Actually, this university didn't help me financially for my mother surgery but If I had not got chance to study here, I wouldn't know them who helped me and my mother. During the operation, I requested to allow me to visit Operational Theater. At first, The doctor denied my request, but I was so curious that forced them think about me. At last but not the least, they allowed me. I was the first patient’s relative who was in O.T. with the special permission from the doctor. They also allowed me in ICU because of my mother’s language problem. For doing all this, I missed my classes for a month, but atleast, I got my mother new life. On 20 April, 2009 my parents returned back to Nepal. Now she is healthy but still with some pain. Yesterday, I talked with my mother and she was making fun on the phone by telling that she can cook food. I was pleased to hear the sentence because from a year, I was waiting to hear my mother happiness.

At last, I would like to thanks to Ms. Annie, Mr. Omar and his families, Ms. Anna and her families, Mr. MIzan, Dr. Niru, Ms. Dilara and many more that helped and supported me to do my mother’s operation.


JaniceW's picture

Such a moving story

Sunita, tears well up in my eyes as I read of your hardships in a foreign land. I have lived in countries where my command of the language was poor and so can only imagine how difficult it must have been for you to secure blood for your mother, navigate the hospital system, ensure your mother was receiving proper care, etc... Your strength and courage is so inspiring and I know that your family must be so proud of you and all that you have achieved. You have truly been a blessing in their lives and will go on to touch so many other lives in a most profound way. I look forward to your bright and amazing future as you are going to take the world by storm one day.

Dearest Janice,

Thank you so much for your comment and support in every step of my life after joining world pulse. You are the one, who comment me and inspire me to do more in the future. Also thank you so much for your email. Hope, all of your blessing will help me to bring change in people’s lives. I can speak Bangla but cannot write that creates me problem while doing my mother operation.
Thank you for your valuable time.
With love and regards

With Love and Regards
Sunita Basnet

Ferdausi's picture


Dear Sunita,
I am really happy to see your writing with full of emotion and inspiration. I do not have any words to give you as compliment. If every family had a daughter like you, they would not want son any more. You have showed your family the value of the girls. We are proud of you. Changes do not come within a short time. The role AUW has played to help you is amazing. Thanks to the AUW. Thanks for writing such emotional and touchy story.

With Love

Dear Ferdausi,
First of all welcome to pulsire. I am pleased to see you in pulsewire. Thank you so much for spending valuable time and reading my long story. Hope so but it's very difficult to bring mental change in male dominated country. You are always welcome.
I don't have any words to say you as you know me very well. I hope AUW and world pulse will play a vital role to change in your life too.
Love you

With Love and Regards
Sunita Basnet

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