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THE UNBORN GIRL CHILD

When nothing else worked out, the cruel and pitiless mind of a ruthless person decided to strangle the pulse of an unborn life.

She who struggled inside the secured place of her origin, was forced to die mercilessly. She hadn’t seen the world nor had glanced at the bright sunlight. The brutal way in which her heart beats stopped could put to shame and guilt, if it had been made visible. How do the merchants of death live an unabashed life without their conscience, after such an unforgiving act?

Since years, daughter has been considered a burden on a family, since the day she is born. The social system and traditions which have instilled in the ignorant minds that a girl is a temporary member of the family and has to be married off , one who cannot help in the financial condition. Hence, she is deprived of the real education and is made to work for the family assisting other women in the household work. The boy child on the other hand is expected to study and get educated else help the earning members to increase the means of livelihood.

Let there be any reason, whether out of fear of one more burden or of marrying the girl off with a heavy dowry, or the thought process where one feels education to girl child isn’t necessary, any of the reasons aren’t nor will be enough to kill a life within the womb of a mother.

In a developing country like India, where the spiritualism was born,the land where out of thirty six crores of deities who are worshipped,maximum are female goddesses,the eradication of such a mindset is yet to be achieved.
The states of Haryana, Punjab, Rajasthan and many more exceed the number of female infanticide in comparison to the other states and have shown increase in the toll in years. A leading newspaper had an article late back in 2012..

“India loses 3 million girls in infanticide”

Still the eyes of millions of Indians are yet to be opened . The gradual change is now pushing the boy ,girl ratio to an extreme ,where there will be a gigantic number of reduction in the number of girls.
This imbalance of nature shall cause more frustration and inequity amongst the people, where for every 1000 boys there will be only one girl left. The decreasing number of girls, is leading to lesser women available for marriages and then the gender unevenness resulting in more gruesome affects of rape and molestation.

The rise of female infanticide has increased in higher percentages, but what affects more is people from noble profession too have been a part of such a genocide.The advanced technologies which were meant for the welfare of everyone, have been misused to render the murderous intentions of some and many. Even after the law passed in 1996, which prohibited the determination of sex of the foetus and provision of punishment for the violation of such act,the killings haven’t lessened.

Many times such infants are even killed within a year of their birth either by organic or inorganic chemicals. This is done by one of the family members or the midwife appointed thus.
How can anyone take such a step to kill his own child before or after she is born? Is the soul inside the heart of a human being become dead? Is this the society in which we live? Shall the human conscience ever wake up? Does any religion and ethic surpass the religion of humanity? Are these the traditions that bind us in the customs of living in an educated society? Is this a nation which shall walk on the path of economic independence and prosperity which fills the way soaked in blood of the millions of unborn children?
These are few questions which we need to think and ask ourselves.
Every problem and crisis has a solution. The need is to understand and realize the depth of problem and the way it has penetrated into minds which are still ignorant. The ignorance and the adamancy of people has made this issue a rather serious and crucial one ,which now has taken dangerous and severe direction to the gender based violence.

"If only every girl had free education,if only every girl had the right to work and choose her career ,if only every girl had the independence of being independent,If only every girl had been taught the morals and ethics yet was allowed to stand with courage against all the immorality and injustice.If only every girl child is not bound in ties of the patriarchal or matriarchal system but allowed to respect the humanitarian relation."
Then would the feared mind of an apprehensive and confused person accept the birth of a girl child in his life more happily. Then shall the vindictive thought of the mean and unkind human exonerate from the clutched minds of humanity.

Speaks thus every unborn girl child,

“Inside the dark place, a ray of light I see,
bright and radiant which makes me glee,
I haven’t yet opened my eyes clearly,
I see through the bits of vision that I perceive,
Through the pulse of my mother,I feel your presence near me,
Await I ,the day, when you shall hold me,
O! my Father of this world,
Why then suddenly you shouted
and ordered someone to get me killed…
What wrong hath I done,to you ..
I just wished to fill your life with smile
and boundless happiness …
to make you more thrilled.”

Comments

SSD's picture

Shining star, You are....

Soumya! The voice that emerge in this post is stentorian mingled with diversity in content, language and expression. You have shared the concerns, visions, struggles, beauty, diversities and commonalities in an enriching way.
One of the common elements is the prejudices, discrimination and submissiveness of girl-child is in the mind-set of patriarchal, but, often times also discovered in the matriarch system -- how even till present in South Asia and Persia (am sure in many other countries/cultures), is the mother-in-law literally playing the role of subjugation on her daughter in law - constantly wanting her to have a son for the first child being borne (these women ought to know that it is not the women's chromosome that decides the gender, it is the male chromosome!), such behaviour arousing from a mother in law as a woman is yet another subject. The synthesis of many expressions and forms convey a striking balance in your post.
I believe there ought to be and shall be a breaking point of such dogmas -- our collective voices shan't be a stone -- it is a lightening which flashes first and then thunders; putting their hands over their ears does not stop the storms from coming--- and we are that thunder, the noise of those un-borne girls who evaporated in a pool of blood.
Shining star, you are....

Cheers,
Shaheen

Soumya Vilekar's picture

Iam humbled

Iam humbled by your words and view which you have for thoughts behind this writing. I am sure such voices when together can create and change the epic to form a new one and are capable of changing the direction of a storm and also the course of a river.
The truth and the science behind the logic of male or female child,even if explained and told umpteen times, just falls like nothing on the deaf ears. The mentality of these mindsets need to changed and this can happen when their hearts feel the tragedy of the incidents around and their conscience pricks to act wisely.
After all ,whether it is social,economical or political crisis,situation or condition,the act is taken by an individual and as such the inner voice of each human needs to be shaken,in order to act nobly and wisely.
I am honoured that this piece gives its voice for this issue of female infanticide strongly and loudly ,which hopefully would reach corners of the world to act upon.

Thank you,
Soumya

binapatel33's picture

hi Soumya Thank you for

hi Soumya

Thank you for posting your thoughts on what is going on in India today!! The traditional mindset of women that continues to plague what is occurring today is the worst thing from helping women move forward. I know that men are equally to blame as the stigmas are set forth by men in Indian society. But if women can rise out of this together, break tradition and think with new change and in today's times, then the change can happen. I think that women place that had stigma on themselves. They need to be bold and celebrate the life of a girl as they do of a boy. I am indian so I can only imagine what you are going through and thinking. I wish more indian women would take part in politics. Although it is hard and easier said then done but women can bring change if they take that initial step by breaking that traditional mindset.

Bina

Kind Regards,
Bina Patel
hc Mediate, LLC
www.hcmediate.com

Soumya Vilekar's picture

Welcoming your thoughts

Dear Bina,
I do reckon and realize what you are trying to say from the facts that have made women of India be left far behind when it comes to such situations.Absolutely the mindset needs to be changed and people should be educated to understand the facts clearly. It is after all the woman who suffers and she herself has to speak for her own.There are umpteen times when some of them are part too of such cruelty due to the age old traditions of having a son who can carry forth the name of teh clan to next generation. By creating boy and a girl when God,didn't discriminate between the two,then who are we as humans to do so?
I sincerely welcome your thoughts and concern as well and also wish to join hands regarding the same for future.

Best wishes,
Soumya

binapatel33's picture

Hi Soumya, Thank you for your

Hi Soumya,
Thank you for your reply. I agree with you, people are evil and God never discriminated with gender. Men created these gender lines and gender issues to be in control. As feminist as this sound, it is very true and literature only proves it. What upsets me that these things continue to exist in modern times! it is sickening and it upsets me greatly b/c innocent women do not deserve this. I know that India has a lot of support groups for women, but unfortunately it is not enough b/c of the high levels of corruption mixed with old mindsets....have you t hought of setting up a support group?

Kind Regards,
Bina Patel
hc Mediate, LLC
www.hcmediate.com

Soumya Vilekar's picture

For a change

Dear Bina,
I agree with you how it feels when we hear of these rising numbers in the toll of female infanticide. What is required is the respect for humanity as humans and this instill a sense of respect for every being that has a life whether around us or ones yet to be born.
Yes the corruption levels and the level of ignorance has let all of them behind the rest and what is needed today is the courage to voice.
I believe in holding hand of every individual and every group that supports and works in the path for this cause,so haven't thought of setting up any particular group for the same. I would like to extend my support to every organisation that is trying to eradicate such mindset.Yes,if by my efforts and endeavour a change can be brought,then I would be honoured to be a part of it.
Thanks,
Soumya

binapatel33's picture

I wish you all the best and

I wish you all the best and thank you for giving us the reality on what exactly is going on!

Kind Regards,
Bina Patel
hc Mediate, LLC
www.hcmediate.com

amymorros's picture

Thank You So Much

India loses 3 million girls in infanticide! Is this every year?

I had not fully realized the extent of this problem. As you so eloquently wrote, having fewer girls born has deleterious effects on the society resulting in more gender-based violence. As you pointed out, "Every problem and crisis has a solution" and I hope that through the work that you are doing mindsets are changing (too slowly, I fear).

Thank you for your contributions and I look forward to reading more.

Amy
@amyinstl

Soumya Vilekar's picture

Bitter truth

Dear Amy,
It is the bitter truth that we have faced today and the figure is of the year 2012 when a leading newspaper in India published this report.A hard hitting fact which can give anguish when heard of ,its the facade which everyone seems to forget . Just because there presence wasn't made on earth,doesn't mean they never had lives.
Iam sure there are lakhs of people who are working towards the goal to eradicate this mindset ,it will still take years to completely wipe out such thoughts from our society and world.

Thanks,
Soumya

sherises's picture

Thank you for Opening my Eyes!

Soumya,

I had NO IDEA this was still so prevalent in parts of India today! How horrible that lives of so many possible world leaders have been extinguished before ever having taken a breath, simply because of their gender!

With your help, perhaps necessary pressure will arise and present itself on those who continue to devalue the life of a woman. How pray tell would these same men exist in a world without being taken care of by women?! If they are not careful, they will only be left with themselves. That would be just in its own way.

Keep spreading the word!

Best,

Julie K. Thompson
"SheRises"

every day go out of your way to do something kind

Soumya Vilekar's picture

Thanks for joining in!

Dear Julie,

This illegal and immoral practice still prevails in many parts of India and this truth is as pathetic and heinous to accept as the rest of crimes. Just because the lives weren't yet born,doesn't give anyone a right to kill the innocent mutes.
My voice is a very minute and almost negligible one to be heard by these people who have become deaf to the voice of their conscience. Even if pressure arises from several organizations,it is the thought process and teh willingness of a n individual that can bring a change.
Main thing is when everyone of the country believes that a girl is no less than a boy and not a burden as it is believed to be,instead is a gift of nature to be treasured and valued,then the change in the society shall become significant and bring results in positive manner.

I believe in your motto,"every day go out of your way to do something kind"
Best wishes,
Soumya

ccontreras's picture

Thank you for sharing

I had no idea there was a higher ratio of males in India in comparison to girls. I think it is very sad that women and perhaps some men by coercing women go on to kill their barely born daughters. And this is something you hear about everywhere in the world though. Where I live, we hear many times about shaken baby syndrome and other child abuses that make me wonder sometimes how unfair is the world, where there are women who would give anything to be mothers and those who are, make the choice to kill or abuse their child. But I do agree with some comments you left to other readers that education is definitely needed as these women are not aware of how times have changed and the countless opportunities that are growing for women around the world, thanks to organizations and the internet.
Cheers and love!
Cynthia

"I embrace emerging experience. I am a butterfly. Not a butterfly collector." - Stafford

Soumya Vilekar's picture

Facts and truth

Dear Cynthia ,
I humbly welcome you in joining here as a different voice form another corner of the world. We all today have the same set of problems some in more or less percentage.
This shocking revelations started to surface when media and other educational program mes highlighted the actual numbers after a huge survey,else it was always an individual affair. The receding numbers in the last few years of females suddenly made many realize and there were organizations,social work done in this field to save the female child. Yet more necessary and practical are supposed to be taken and more purposedly the biased thoughts of people are to be removed. Although the problem doesn't persist in whole of India,still it prevails in most of the parts and that percentage is higher.

Thanks for sharing your views too
Best wishes,
Soumya

Mila's picture

Thank you!

Hi Soumaya,

Wow, your writing is so powerful. There were two parts that really stood out to me: that the gender ration is going to be 1: 1,00 and how our humanity should trump our ethnicity and religion. The statistic of gender ratio is so stunning that it immediately catchings the reader's attention. I automatically started to think of all of the consequences of the ratio for generations and generations...I too find it hard to believe that it is 2013 and female infanticide is still happening! A small point to consider--while your beginning and ending are touching they made me think of the abortion debate, which is another huge topic that I feel should be kept separate from this issue as people who disagree over abortion can still agree to be against female infanticide.

Thank you for raising awareness and for fighting against this practice. Are you currently working with local organizations? How do you suggest people help this cause?

All the very best,
Mila

Soumya Vilekar's picture

Welcome

Dear Mila,
It is the need of the hour Mila, wherever we are on earth,humanity has to be our foremost and the most important belief in life. The other beliefs come latter in life which are a part of our living and traditions.
About female infanticide it has become the gravest of issues in India and has to be dealt rather in a fast pace,even though it is a hard task and a bigger one. Ya,when we sit and think of the age where we live in today,2013,it sounds very unimaginable about these hard hitting facts.
This issue of female infanticide is rather different from that of abortions,as this is selective infanticide not due to any health reasons but because of the thought process of many who consider female to be the weaker sex and are yet to believe that she too can be at par with her male counterpart.
And it is not only the mindset ,ther are several issues that need to be solved prior to the advices that we give to such people.
There should be free education for girls and equal opportunities for her in fields of education and career.
She should have the right to choose her career and life without being forced into early marriage.,which is also another topic here.
She should be treated equally as the male members of the family.

When certain things get cleared gradually,the fixed opinions of many would change when they observe live examples in the society.
Iam not working currently with any organization,though I would always like to extend my hands of support to all,
Thanks
Soumya

RosemaryC's picture

Mourning the missing women

Dear Soumya:
When I first read about what Dr. Amartya Sen called the 'missing women', I was truly shocked. He gave words to the full impact of something that had been happening in private over many years. See http://www.wikigender.org/index.php/Missing_Women
That work in the 1980s gave us numbers, and a sense of how vast the space was that was left because these women weren't here.
By going right in close, you have given them a voice, and an individual shape and picture. Thank you for seeing them, and grieving them, and advocating for them. You have a powerful voice.
Blessings,
Rosemary

Soumya Vilekar's picture

Iam obliged to be a part

Dear Rosemary,
Iam thankful that you thought of me as a voice for the article that you linked in. I read it and yes truly acknowledge the same.
I did try to give a personal perspective to the situation,where an individual soul of one of those missing would speak as and I am obliged you could feel and get connected to it. It is through a voice when we shall be able to communicate the real situation of the world.
People like you who have the compassion of hearing out such voices can broadcast the voice elsewhere with more intensity.
Thanks ,
Soumya

Diane Ezeji's picture

What if the dowry system was

What if the dowry system was ended? Would that help? What if there was an incentive given to families with female children: such as a small income for each year the girl stays in school. What if girls weren't sent away at marriage age, stopping the concept of them as temporary family. It is tough to think of how to make a culture value women. It is sad that we have to make a case for why women are valuable, but it seems that's where we start from.

Diane Ezeji

Soumya Vilekar's picture

You nailed the point

Dear Diane,
Thank you very much for your precious and absolutely correct analysis for the present scenario. Although ,the roots lie embedded far beneath the ground and it is really very very hard to remove it ,yet it has to be done. The system of dowry which has been through ages cannot be eradicated in a day,month or a year,a continuous effort is required to uproot the bad things of the society.
The initiative that you talked about for the girl child has already been taken by the government at many places in towns and villages but the fact remains is whether the localite and the needy who is already indebted with so many other debts, does he receive the actual incentive. Its corruption then,which makes it way big in between and snatches away the small initiatives.
For the marraige of girls at an early age has been stopped and is nw illegal,yet thousands of families get their daughters marry away at a minor age. IT all depends now on the thought process,the knowledge and the realization of the actual effects all these have on the girls,only then the problem will start having a step towards, it getting disappeared.
I agree with you completely when you say, that we have to make them realize that women are valuable,its a real pity..but sometimes when things are forgotten or situation arises we need to be assertive to remind them of their follies and crimes.
You wrote all the gists in the comment as what could be the points that need to be taken to start this initiative in an effective way.
I am really obliged that you shared these precious views here.
Best wishes ,
Soumya

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