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Introducing myself and my journal: Peace of Mind

About Me:
I wish I could choose two flags for my country! Although born and grew up in Japan, I have lived longer time in London and have been naturalised as a British citizen recently. It is a funny twist of fate because my mother country and my adopted home country were enemies once and fought many battles to the bitter end, one of which my father was sent to as a young soldier. This campaign in Burma was near suicidal as a plan and he was one of 12,000 survived out of 80,000 soldiers.

His trauma was repressed and came out as violent rage throughout our family life and none of us, including my mother had any idea where it was coming from. We children suffered so called 'Trans-generational trauma', especially my eldest brother.

Without realising, I made the first step of my journey to understand the cause of his rage and the person I never knew as a father when I'd moved to London in my twenties. I began to piece my fragmented mind and body a little by little in a long meandering course of life.
He had never talked about the war except to say it was a Living Hell. When he turned 80, I plucked up my courage to ask him if he could talk to me about the war. I bought a small video camera.

That was the beginning of my filmic journey, which guided me to Burma in 2005. When I returned to London a month later, I began editing the footage for my father to see how all the places he'd told me looked like now. He never brought himself to watch it. It broke my heart.

I went deeper into my soul and came back out at the end of 2008 with a 53 minutes documentary film to tell my own story. It is called 'Singing To A Ghost'.

The two hours he spoke to me on video was his gift to me, and now at the age of 52, I finally have inner peace. Every time I see people suffering in a conflict, my heart goes out to them, and every time I see soldiers or fighting men my heart goes out to their mothers, wives and children at present and in future. I would love to be a farmer who sow seeds of peace.

My Passions:
Peace, Spirituality, Arts

My Challenges:
Find a way to utilise all my skills I have to contribute to a peaceful world

My Vision for the Future:
Peace Wave - people say Peace in turn and create a human voice wave running around the globe like a Mexican Wave

My Areas of Expertise:
Video filming, Editing (Final Cut Pro), Narration, Voice over

Comments

JaniceW's picture

Welcome

We are so honoured to have you as a member of our community. I am of Chinese descent and my father's family went through their own period of trauma in China as the country went through periods of conflict. My grandmother never spoke of her evacuation from China but held deep-rooted prejudice against the Japanese until the day she died. It was something that I found difficult to understand and it was only long after she had passed, that I learnt the reasons for some of her ill feelings. I understand how difficult it is for those who have been through war and civil conflict, to talk about their experiences but also, am a great believer in the power of forgiveness and reconciliation, and wish I had had the opportunity to talk to my grandmother as an adult (she passed away when I was young).

I so admire you for taking the steps towards helping your father come to terms with his past and although he never viewed the finished piece, I have no doubt that just by talking about his experiences, it was in some way cathartic for him. Is your documentary available for viewing online as I would be very interested in viewing it?

Also, take a moment to browse through our group directory (http://www.worldpulse.com/pulsewire/groups) where you may find a group with similar interests to your own. Or, you may consider starting your own group where you can build a powerful network bringing together PulseWire members with similar visions who want to share ideas or actions. With the group journal, you can brainstorm solutions, pose questions, test ideas and create a support network for your visions.

Voices, such as your own, have transformed lives and I look forward to reading more from you. Again, welcome and I know that you will find PulseWire to be engaging, inspiring and thought-provoking.
Janice
PulseWire Community Director

Noriko Aida's picture

Dear Janice, Thank you for

Dear Janice,

Thank you for your kind and considerate email.

During my life in the UK, from TV programmes to articles in the paper, I've learnt the history and atrocities caused by the Japanese army which were never in the history books in the school. I've also experienced hostile feelings harboured by the Chinese or Chinese decent people personally as well. As it happened, when I arrived in Mandalay in Burma, the moment I turned the BBC news channel on in my hotel room, pictures of anti-Japanese demonstrations jumped at me from the screen. I was standing there paralysed - I was tracing back the past and there it was, the huge wound of the past was still afresh, unhealed...

My father has never acknowledged what our talk meant to him but according to my mother, it was somewhat cathartic experience for him. My film is not available for viewing on line as yet but a DVD copy has been sent to attention of Corine Milano, your managing editor a few days ago. I hope you will be able to get hold of it through her. I have a very simple website showing a trailer. www.hotarufilms.com

I've looked early part of the groups directory and am thinking of joining a couple already.

Thanks again for your welcome and I hope I will be able to contribute something to your inspiring supportive community.

Best wishes.

Nori

jadefrank's picture

WELCOME!

Hi Noriko,

Welcome to PulseWire! It is wonderful to have you here in this community. I too am very interested in viewing your film, "Singing to a Ghost." It sounds fascinating, moving and so meaningful. I look forward to hearing more of your voice on PulseWire.

Warm regards,
Jade

Noriko Aida's picture

Hi Jade. Thank you for your

Hi Jade.

Thank you for your warm welcome and for your interest in my film.

I've just mentioned to Janice that a DVD copy of the film has been posted attention to Corine Milano, your managing editor a few days ago. I hope you can get hold of it through her. I have a very simple website, showing a short trailer. www.hotarufilms.com

It's so wonderful to be welcomed and I hope I will be able to make some contribution to your inspiring community by sharing my stories and visions.

Best wishes.

Nori

jadefrank's picture

Eagerly awaiting...

Hi Nori,

Wonderful! I am so glad that you have sent a copy to Corine - I look forward to watching it and seeing your story and vision. I'm so glad that you are a part of the PulseWire community!

Warm regards,
Jade

JaniceW's picture

Prejudice

Nori,
I am sorry that you have been the subject of anti-Japanese sentiment and I do understand some of the deep-rooted feelings having heard the Chinese perspective but in saying that, I still feel so strongly that as citizens of the world, we must do our best to forgive and reconcile those feelings so that we have peace within. I am so happy that our generation is reaching out across borders and cultures, and seeing beyond the history. Maybe it takes a generation or so to keep the past in the past as we are that much more removed from it. I look forward to viewing your DVD and will follow up with Corine, who is out of the office today. Best wishes in your future endeavours and I hope to read more of your journey.
Janice

Noriko Aida's picture

Beyond the history

Dear Janice,

I hope I did not create a misleading impression when I mentioned about my personal experience. It was intended to mean that having known some historical facts, I could totally understand where those deep seated feelings were coming from. Indeed I apologised to some of the people for the horrendous deed of the army...I'm sure your grandmother's experience must have been quite harrowing too.

One of the difficulties I faced in the process of making my film was that I could see different perspectives such as that of British people as well as Chinese and other people in Asia. 20 years ago, I met an English gentleman who'd spent years in the notorious Thai-Burma Railway concentration camp and yet he offered me a warm friendship and asked me to call him 'Uncle Fred'.
In Burma, for Uncle Fred, I made a trek to the southern border town to Thailand to find a Museum dedicated to the railway. After a hot long day's search, I eventually found a small deserted building, housing models, maps, photos and haunting drawings of POWs. I tried but with my very limited resources, I could not incorporate those elements to tell a cohesive story. In the end, I decided to tell it from my very personal perspective in order not to give any half baked views on still painful memories surrounding my story.

I am happy and grateful for the opportunity and for your generous heart to make communication such as this possible. I would like to join you as a citizen of the world to reach out across borders, cultures and beyond the history.

Best wishes

Nori

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