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Lost a Cousin cum daughter 22nd April 2013

its 12.46 i get a call. the slat helpline counsellor comes for me in my office about 50 yards away.
its a surprise no one ever calls me on this helpline
i talk to my Son
mum, Pleasure is not moving
what is the problem?, 'i dont know he says'
what has happened is it the usual sickness of fainting and getting breathless
i don't know he cried
come now he said

i quickly closed my laptop my world pulse page, shared about my children including my cousins my care
immediately got a vehicle. On my way i read a message my son has sent - 'it seems she is dead' ikept hope alive
i have parted with her at 10.12 that very morning
15 minutes was enough for me to reach
this is about 1.10pm,
i found a crowd near my house
is she dead i asked, go and see for yourself

i slowly moved inside the house act.
a crowd, nowhere to step
i found three women neighbours cleaning her bums,
she had spoilt herself during the shameless and strange act
she seemed still alive
i called a special hire/taxi
i asked all people out so that we have Pleasures fresh air
hoping she was still alive

in 20 minutes we were in Mengo Hospital
she was declared dead
my 13 year old girl
i had stayed with her for 9 years
she had just joined high school
on this fateful day she had stayed home, the school asked them to remain home since they had completed exams.
i had not felt well about it as i had paid for the whole term but school was stopping children two weeks earlier.

Pleasure has asked me for a reading desk and that morning i put it in her bedroom
as i left she was going to wash cooking utensils and my son was also in the sitting room.
we talked about her performance an how i wanted her to read hard and achieve her vision of being a doctor
Pleasure was intelligent and i had high hopes in her
i had told her never to move to neighbours unless sent, never to leave the house after 7pm unaccompanied
i though i was protecting her.

the story - Pleasure was found tied on her bed suffocated with a pillow to death
after being gang defiled/raped around midday
what a pain and what a loss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
there is a deep pit in my stomach
but also my son was the first suspect and imprisoned
we buried Pleasure on Wednesday deep in our village in Kabale
we came back to Kampala Thursday
Friday i was able to secure police bond for my son
who had been the first one on the scene of crime.
he had left Pleasure about 30 minuted ago
only to find her unconcsious
He rushed called a neighbour who made an alarm and everybody came on the scene
evidence was tampered with
we are yet to find out/or rather police to do their role and investigate
we have put gospel armour in the hope that the rapist an murderer can be seen

my sons did not bury their aunt who had become their sister
pray for us!!!!!!!!
we only hope it has nothing to do with land, office, friends, love
but thugs as are common these days in Kampala
otherwise we are engulfed in fear but believe Jesus will be our protection
Since government has failed to protect us and our property
preoccupied with politics


Kim Crane's picture

My heart is with you

Flavia, I can't imagine the horror and sadness that you are going through. My deepest sympathies for the loss of your cousin in such a cruel, devastating manner. I hope with time you find peace and answers.

ikirimat's picture

This is such a shocking story

This is such a shocking story sister,
rape cases are highly on the rise in kampala now. Every day in the news, there is a rape case.
Im still in shock, I can only say, may her soul rest in eternal peace.

Grace Ikirimat

"It takes the hammer of persistence to drive the nail of success."

its worthy knowing that someone cares.

Best regards.

mrbeckbeck's picture


This is horrifying and shocking, I can only imagine how devastated you are feeling. We are standing with you in support as best we can. I hope that you are able to find some relief in a sense of community here. The world has seen too much of this, the time for change is now.

Scott Beck
World Pulse Online Community Manager

LeanaM's picture

Strength and Love

Flavia, I only with there were something I could do to ease your pain...please know that I am sending all my strength, energy, and love to you...

flaviakyomukama's picture

Thanks friends

Thanks for the comforting words

will cope i guess, but to be frank i have never met death as close as this so its still tough for me.

Thanks again and please pray for us

Best regards,

dear dear Flavia,

As I read your title, I naively thought the loss of your cousin was from cancer or other unrelenting illness. My heart aches knowing that this was a senseless, human-caused tragedy. I will never understand how one human can violently do this to another. I hope that by sharing your pain and loss, that the collective goodness in the world will help uncover those that are so evil and that we find a way to prevent atrocities like this from happening.

know that you are in my heart and my prayers. we are here for you.

with love,

kimmlarson's picture


Dear Flavia,

My heart aches for you. I am also sending all of my strength, thoughts, and love to you and your family through this tragedy. Know that we are all here supporting you, but I wish there was more I could do for you.....


Nicole.Staudinger's picture

So Sorry

Dear Flavia,

I am so, so sorry for your loss. I can't even imagine the frustration, anger and sorrow you must be suffering. I can only send love and hope that one day, this world will reach a point where beautiful, bright children are safe from such horrors, and can achieve their full potentials.

My heart is with you.


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