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I come from a polygamous family but it is something I would never advice any woman to settle for though I wouldn’t want to judge those who settle for that, but why bring this up here? It is because it impacted a lot in my life and it wasn’t a pleasant experience. What hurts men hurts women too no man would agree to share one woman yet women are suppose to share a man and live under the same roof or compound but women because of love for their family and their big heart they sacrifice so much in the name of making their children happy and everyone else around them happy. I know women sacrifice so much and one such woman is my beloved mother who has been through a lot and I pray that one day she will have the most basic things that matters most to her and all the tears she has ever shed will turn in to joy because I know then the joy will be in abundance since she has cried so much. After sitting for my primary examination I did not proceed to secondary I come from a polygamous family, I have a step mother and my mother was the first wife, but that is not school like any other child because my father had just passed away a year before. I lived praying and hoping that one day I will continue with my studies and after almost eight do a four year course in less than two years and did the same national examination done nationally and I passed and was able to enroll in a local University though at the moment though a lot of challenges are always creeping inn, but I believe that soon I will graduate despite the challenges because I believe through education I will liberate myself, my community and most especially women and girl child. I pray for the day that every girl will be able to access education.
As a young girl I experienced both love and hate love from my mother and father and some family members but I also witnessed too much hypocrisy that to this date I can’t stand people who are hypocritical. With my father alive despite his weaknesses he was a loving man with a big heart who wanted the best for us and when it comes to education and how he treated us he never discriminated his daughters instead he wanted me to study and become someone independent who is able to provide for herself, but all that vanished when he passed away and my uncles all our properties and sold his business and more than ten years later they are still grabbing the remaining small land how sad ? If my mom was empowered all this would have never happened that is why I am struggling to access education and always ready to inform anybody out there on how to access any training that could empower them in any way. In my community, girls get pregnant and drop out school and a boy child would always be given first priority when it comes to education or even when meals are served there is a belief that fine parts, nutritious meal and large portion should be reserved for boys yet what they do not know that a girl child too need nutrition and energy because every month they lose a lot of energy.
Another greatest challenge girls face is poverty level which is very rampant in my community hence men older to be their father have sex with young girls so that they are able to access sanitary towels hence high level of HIV/AIDS in my community and wife inheritance is also a major contributor because some women are forced into such practices without their consent an d my mother was thrown out of our home because she refused to be inherited currently the statics show that people from my community that is Nyanza Province in Kisumu are the most affected and infected in Kenya and I am yet to find out why but I am seeking help on how to go about it in order to do my research in order to save women and girls in my community. Personally I have been empowered and tomorrow I will be spending time with alaDy from my community who found out that she was recently infected and tomorrow will be our second meeting so I will give her all my support and walk with her all the way through and help others too. I am not rich but I have a big heart and I know how to give a shoulder to lean on, and I will be the change I want because it starts with me.

This story was written for World Pulse’s Girls Transform the World Digital Action Campaign.

World Pulse believes that women's stories, recommendations, and collective rising leadership can—and will—bring girls greater access to education which will transform their lives, their families, and communities. The Girls Transform Campaign elicits insightful content from young women on the ground, strengthens their confidence as women, and ensures that influencers and powerful institutions hear their stories.
Learn more »


you have done what you need to do - and what you can do now, is share your skills and strategies to other young girls & women! Create a circle of Gracious women like you! find another woman your age and mentor her! See yourself a the leader you are and pass it forward to others, keep going! I am very happy for you and your accomplishments...

"Be the change you want in the world." Gandhi

Debra K. Adams, MA
See my vizify bio!
Survivors In Service: Self Empowerment Strategies (SiSSeS)
Consultant/Speaker/Author & Owner/Founder

Gracious's picture

In the process Debra

I am trying to mentor someone already I hope she'll find joy in giving and sharing her knowledge because I believe that there is joy in giving than there is in recieving.


LisaXi's picture

Leading the Way One Step at a Time


It sounds like you are already leading the way, providing support, and shaping social change. Keep up the good work at the university- I truly believe education is the key to women changing the world!

Gracious's picture

I will work hard

Yea I am doing my best because I believe that there will always be light at the end of tunnel


binapatel33's picture


Thank you for sharing your story. You are on the right track to achieve your vision of education. I agree with you, education is the key for every human to create a better life path. I know that you will do a very good job with helping women obtain an education, get additional training. Do you have any programs for education or training in your community? How do the women become educated in your community? You have the desire to lead in promoting education in your village and I know that you can be very successful.

Kind Regards,
Bina Patel
hc Mediate, LLC

Rebecca Andruszka's picture

thank you

Thank you for being so honest in your story. You clearly have the strength and resolve to graduate and help other girls in your community do the same.

Activechica's picture

I applaud you

The change has begun with you and you are the future. Thank you for sharing the challenges that women and girls face in your country's culture. By bringing these issues to light and supporting one another, it will make a difference.
I am behind you, cheering you on!

Warmest wishes,

Gracious's picture

I'm Gratefull Leslie

Thank you for assuring me of your support it goes along way.


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