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I won

A lot of things cannot be explained in life but they can help provide way of prevention. If you want to describe me now, you might say I am an attractive young woman but try describing me, say like 17 or 18 years ago, and you’ll come up with an ugly duckling so I wonder why a man would feel a sexual attraction to a kid. That is one of the unexplainable issues in life especially when the man does not have a record of mental health.
My first experience of sexual abuse was when my father’s cousin residing with us attempted to rape me after which he was restricted from our family. My mother was a trader and I automatically became her delivery girl being the firstborn. It was my duty to deliver goods ordered for but this duty turned sour when a customer of hers made another rape attempt but I got rescue by one of his clients and never returned. A repeat of this ugly event happened again with a family friend and I started having panic attacks anytime I find myself alone with any man, so I grew up hating men and what they represent.
Fourteen years later, my nightmare returned in the form of my friend’s brother. I was waiting in her room when her brother came in and almost had raped me. Initially, it started with jokes but suddenly he got violent, pushed me to the bed and wanted to remove my clothing but I struggled, determined to hold on to my dignity as a woman. I remember I told him that he would only have his way if I was dead. He laughed wickedly and said that it was okay if I wanted it dead and started to choke me with a pillow; I couldn’t breathe and after a while I stopped struggling thinking I’d won the battle because he wouldn’t rape me alive. I was saved by the early return of his sister whom he’d sent an errand out so he could be alone with me. I still can’t forget the horror of almost seeing death face to face but I have been able to put it away and move on without hatred for every man I meet. A number of events can mar the good in a person but I have come to realize that only a strong woman can move through the maze of life despite the ugliness it might present.
I realized when we allow evil acts go unpunished, the future becomes foggy. Rape has become very prevalent in Nigeria and I feel that if every reported rape cases are properly treated, it might have saved other victims. I was lucky but a lot of girls aren’t now. During the compulsory NYSC mandated for every graduate in Nigeria, I did my Community Development Service with Women Trafficking and Child Labor Eradication Foundation (WOTCLEF) where I was able to share my experience as a source of motivation to others.

Comments

Lilith784's picture

I am so impressed by your

I am so impressed by your strength to not only get through the horrible experiences you've had, but to be so outspoken about them and to draw motivation for supporting and protecting others from it.

Love,
Andrea

seunaboy's picture

it was a long journey, Andrea

Hi Andrea
Thanks.
it took a long time before i could overcome the thinking that "it was I that had something wrong about her" to move on. it became necessary to heal with others when i realised the need to help someone its horrors.
Avenues like worldpulse will help anyone release her person to help others.

Regards
Oluwaseun

sherises's picture

indomitable

Hello, Seunaboy,

Indomitable is the word that comes to mind when I listen to you tell your story. It is difficult living in world that tends to minimize women and girls. Nigeria will be better off for your efforts and continued involvement in trafficking and child labor exploitation.

How has the emergence of digital media helped to shape the way you perceive the future of women like yourself and how you can use your passion to empower others who may have suffered the same as you?

I look forward to reading your future posts.

Best,
Julie

every day go out of your way to do something kind

seunaboy's picture

the walls are fallen.....down

Hi Sherises

thanks.
Digital media has only helped women like to break through the wall of limitations we have always existed. it has further allowed our views and opinions be shared with everyone without the barriers of gender.

i do not hestitate to share my views always as almost everyone has access to social media now.

regards
Oluwaseun

Lisa T's picture

Strong

Dear seunaboy,

Thank you for sharing your story. Your personal narrative is very powerful. I especially like the phrase, "A number of events can mar the good in a person but I have come to realize that only a strong woman can move through the maze of life despite the ugliness it might present." I was left wondering how you came to World Pulse and how you see it as part of your vision for the future. I look forward to reading more of your writing!

Sincerely,
Lisa

seunaboy's picture

proceed...we must proceed

hi Lisa
i have always known life is no bed of roses, i now know that no matter what may, proceed....move on is the only worthy option.

thanks for your comment

regards

Oluwaseun

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