It disgusts me..
Yes I’ll admit it. I fight for women’s rights, empowerment and protection. But I also fight for gender equality which includes men’s rights, empowerment and protection; and it disgusts me when I read about men being victimized, and people criticizing and insulting those victims for talking out and seeking assistance in attaining justice for their victimization. Just because they’re men doesn’t make them less worthy or less deserving of attaining justice.
Violence against women occurs so much now that it has become the “norm”; on the other hand, violence against men, happens all around the world and manifests itself in various forms, but it so underreported and shunned upon, that when male victims speak out about their victimized they are further rejected.
Recently, a 19 year old boy was sexually assaulted by 4 women in Toronto. Commentators, criticizers and disrespectful critics spent so much time talking about the weight of the assaulters, their age and the fact that their victim was a 19 year old guy that they completely bypassed what really happened. A 19 year old guy was sexually assaulted – period. A crime occurred, leaving a man victimized and forever scarred.
Here were some of their unnerving comments:
- “How’s that assault shouldn’t that be called Heaven RT @CP24: Men sexually assaulted by 4 women after leaving club” - @big_business
- “@laajonnes: “@CP24: Man sexually assaulted by 4 women after leaving club […] wait, whaaat? :D” his ass was happy as hell” - @_Bugsy
- “@laajonnes that’s what I’m saying every mans dream…?” - @_DancehallLife
- “5 foot 4, 200 lbs? I’da screamed rape! My prayers are with this guy. :) - @whoners
- “Four fat girls sexually assault and rape a guy in Toronto: now every fat girl is pub(l)ic enemy” - @KCxcobra
- “I aint going to no god damn Toronto Fat bitches rape dudes up there” - @DOUBLERxRAFFY
Ultimately, for a million reasons and more (including the above examples,) I have so much respect for the authors who post some of the most thought provoking and inspirational pieces on the Good Men Project website. Aside from their many goals and purposes, some of their main reasons for having this site (in my belief) are: to redefine what it means to be a male; to redefine the term “masculinity,” and to re-examine how the pre-existing masculine image negatively impacts a growing/adult male’s life experiences (especially when they are victimized – as in this case).
The authors of the Good Men Project, remind us all of so many important factors about male victimization, that we so often (and coincidently) forget, because we’re so blinded by the media’s interpretation of masculinity vs. victimization (vulnerability).
Here are some of those critical reminders:
- “First and foremost, we’re stuck on the term rape, which is still a very gendered term. Until last year, the federal definition of rape only covered the forcible penetration of a man’s penis in a woman’s vagina [...] We can talk about how sexual violence impacts some worse than others. It’s a lot easier to discuss, debate and become irate about these differences (some of which are important) rather than focusing on how a gendered conversation shuts out the potential to work together to call an end to all types of sexual violence […] Men are victims of sexual violence” – Sarah Beaulieu
- “Please tell the United Nations that males get HIV/AIDS from being trafficked too” – Cameron Conaway
- “For a problem to be solved we must first see it for what it is. This applies to anything from fundamental calculus to fiscal cliffs. I can’t pretend to know much about either, but I’ve learned enough in my extensive research into sex trafficking to know this: the sex trafficking of boys is essentially absent from the conversation […] “The public isn’t ready for it,” I’ve been told. Truth is, we only speak about the victimization of boys when it’s forced on us by breaking-news scandals like those of Jerry Sandusky or The Boys Scouts of America. As the news story fades so too does the conversation”
It is so important that we spend critical time redefining these concepts of ‘what it means to be a man’ or what ‘masculinity’ means, so that we can eliminate these horrible criticisms over male victims speaking out and trying to get help. Just because they are men doesn’t make them less deserving of justice. They experience horrific incidents of victimization just as much as women do; and they should have equal right in fighting for their justice, their rights and their protection.
Yes, I fight for women’s rights, empowerment and protection – but, I also fight for men’s rights, empowerment and protection; and I have to thank the Good Men Project for a lot of that.
It disgusts me, and I hope it disgusts you too; so please join The Good Men Project & Saving Angel + so many more as well all fight for gender equality, empowerment & protection.
Convo-Graphic: The Truth About Men and Sexual Violence http://shar.es/dToa6 via @sharethis