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Cherished Child

My daughter is Teacher of the Year at her school. I know that much of her ability is because she was cherished by many even before she was born, and ever since. She also had access to many resources that were brought to her by excess resources of her parents and our communities. We had different communities, but we all cherished our child.

If there is one thing that I know with all certainty, it is that what we feel for our unborn children does make a difference in their souls as they struggle to grow from animals with human potential into fully human beings. In animal husbandry, it is understood that a stressed mother produces weaker babies. In humanity, we choose to believe that we are other than animals with a special sacred spark, which can be snuffed out.

Women must honor this truth. If we have no resources to support ourselves, we have no extras to offer to our children. We have been given the gift of control of our ability to procreate. We must, for the love of the child's sacred soul, choose to accept this control. If a man's only coping strategy is physical force, he is not suitable to be a spouse or partner in parenting.

We must wake up as women. A man with no compassion for the vulnerability of other animals (and human are animals) is not going to have compassion for our vulnerabilities when we are made more vulnerable by pregnancy and childcare responsibilities. None of us can run as fast or fight as hard while pregnant or carrying children on our hips.

We all want to be held and in partnerships with others, but until we, with or without partnerships, have excess resources, we should not believe that we are right in creating new life. New life takes immense focused energy, time, and other resources.

Anyone who has a child to secure his or her own place (or the family "name") in life or eternity is abusing the child. Children must be given complete freedom to become what they are meant to be, once they reach adulthood. Most have to move away from our communities, at least temporarily, in order to reach their full potential.

A child is a gift to the universe, not a personal present for our own use and entertainment. Unless extra resources are available, simply say "no" to procreation. You can "Go forth, be fruitful and multiply" your own talents and resources in so many other ways.

It may take a community to raise a child, but first, you must belong to a community with resources that they are willing to share in exchange for what you have to offer. Become fully yourself before you become a parent to others.

This story was written for World Pulse’s Girls Transform the World Digital Action Campaign.

World Pulse believes that women's stories, recommendations, and collective rising leadership can—and will—bring girls greater access to education which will transform their lives, their families, and communities. The Girls Transform Campaign elicits insightful content from young women on the ground, strengthens their confidence as women, and ensures that influencers and powerful institutions hear their stories.
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Comments

turtledove100's picture

you make some great points.

You make some great points and I agree that more people should think about what it means to have a child, not just in the beginning, but what it will take to nurture and grow and help that child for their entire life!

"Ours is not the task of fixing the entire world all at once, but of stretching out to mend the part of the world that is within our reach" (Clarissa Pinkola Estes, author and poet)

Y's picture

Children's Rights to Be Wanted

I believe that we MUST re-frame the argument for conception control on children's rights to be wanted. As a mother, I know how hard it is to give one's life over to the gestation, death-defying birth, and care of children with full function. I can't even imagine the commitment that care for low or non-functioning children must entail.

I was blessed by having a father for my children that, although he scorned me, financially supported his children. I am now doubly blessed by a man who honors my motherhood above all other aspects of my being.

Y

amymorros's picture

teacher of the year

Thank you for your story submission for the Girls Transform the World campaign. It is clear from your strong words why your daughter, and others with similar support systems, have done so well. Certainly, it is essential for us to think of the kind of environment that our children will be joining once they are born. If only a loving, supporting family was the reality for everyone.

Amy
@amyinstl

I appreciated so many points you made in your submission! My favorite point was your encouragement for women to become themselves first before becoming parents. I also thank you for lifting out that saying "no" is important, as is teaching our boys that force is never acceptable -- those who use force are not acting as part of the human family.

Congratulations on your daughter's recognition as Teacher of the Year. I'm sure you are very proud and your words give strength to women as they make decisions about choosing a partner or becoming a parent.

Thank you!

My best,
Jone

Jone M. Bosworth, JD

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