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Lets unite against unlawful bashing of Women in some Asian countries

Otto Tendayi Mponda

Written by Otto Tendayi Mponda

I am of the belief that a women is a precious human being as she is capable of bringing new life into the world.
And therefore, beating up a woman should never be justified regardless of who might have caused the dispute.
Because when you beat up a woman you have beaten up a mother, sister and aunt to someone, which is why I have decided to revisit the issue of domestic violence.

Although the issue of domestic violence may be seen by some as old news, it still remains a big challenge in our modern day societies. I know it is a scary issue for many victims, but I believe that we need to address the issues that scare us, as it is in what scares us that we find what saves us.

In recent past there has been an increase in cases of domestic violence towards women by men around the world. A very recent example of the public bashing of women by men occurred in Ludhiana, a place in India, whereby four men beat up a helpless woman with iron rods as people watched on and recorded videos on their phones, simply because she had asked one of the men for her money she had lent him. Footage of this incident can be found on the following website although viewer descretion is advised:

http://news.naij.com/31358.html

The problem facing most women in Asian countries like India, for example, is that even the police and authorities themselves seem not to take cases of domestic or public violence towards women by men seriously when reported. It is my vision that governments of countries around the world look beyond their own political interests and try to address the plights of the abused women who may be silenced from reporting cases of domestic violence by political, religious and patriarchal beliefs in their communities. Human rights should be practiced at all times, by bringing to book any man who beats up a woman, in accordance with the laws of every country. Closer in Africa, l was also saddened to hear that two young men were disqualified from season 7 of last year's Big Brother Africa reality show after beating up their fellow female contestants live on international television.

As a matter of truth, the violence towards women that was witnessed by many viewers on Digital Satelite Television on the 2012 edition of Big Brother Africa actually made me think of the may women who were silently still suffering from domestic violence in their current relationships and marriages across the globe.
What even angered me most was that one of the gentleman disqualified in last year's Big Brother house had beaten up his fellow female compatriot from the same country of Zimbabwe , just a few years after Zimbabwe had endorsed the Domestic Violence Bill of 2007 that preached a zero percent tolerance towards all forms of domestic abuse against women.

At its inception, the bill in question was very much publicized and the whole nation was conscientised against beating up women and yet the Zimbabwean male representative proceed to violate women's rights at a very high profile event such as Big Brother Africa as shown in the following link below, something that surely left a lot to be desired.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x2W0QqGAQ7I

Therefore, the message I have for women currently experiencing domestic violence is that it is never too late to make it stop and that courage and diligence may be needed. Emotional and physical abuse is not permitted by the law and it is your right to report such cases to your nearest authorities such as the police. If you fear identification you can anonymously seek advice from other women here on WorldPulse, there will surely be someone non- judgmental willing to listen and refer you to other useful organisations that will definitely help you with constructive advise.
Please do not suffer in silence, you can even confide in a friend or close family members so that you know you are not alone.

I would definitely love to be a Voice of the Future correspondent so that l can be able to use that platform to advocate for women's rights and their protection from all forms of abuse.
Although my voice is necessary, I can't do it alone without your joint efforts.
Having said this, lets all (both men and women) please fight against domestic violence and all forms of abuse by taking one stand and speaking in one voice.
Watch out for one another and lets advise each other accordingly,
as the emotional scars caused from emotional and domestic abuse are far more aggravating than any physical pain, which is why we all need to stand up and make our voices collectively heard on online social forums such as WorldPulse.
It's high time we put an end to domestic violence once and for all, DON'T YOU AGREE?

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Comments

estelle's picture

Inspired by a male folk

Hi Hillary, I am overwhelmed with joy seeing a male with encouraging words on this platform. U make me proud being a woman. So glad and I'm luving everything u shared. keep in touch, we need men like u who will pad the backs of women.

hillary24's picture

You give me strength

Thank you for your kind and encouraging words. I'm deeply humbled and will surely keep in touch. Kind regards

Abisinuola's picture

thank you!

Its beautiful that men are also rising up to take up our cause on saying NO to violence against women....the light is closer than we think,and yes,I do agree with you all the way.keep on speaking!

Abisinuola

Roksana Hasib's picture

We need to stand together

Yes, I agree too that it's inspiring how a man is speaking up for a woman's right. Actually, this is what we all need at this point. We need to stand together, both men and women, to protect our rights.
Just to share, I have also seen domestic violence in my community. And, surprisingly, I have also encountered some men who actually speak up against it. Men like them and Otto Tendayi Mponda, in one hand set examples for other men about how to treat a women; and on the other hand, assures women that they are not alone in their fight for right.
Thank you so much for sharing this.

Best regards,
Roksana.

CynthiaM's picture

A step in the right direction

Thank you Hilary for speaking up. I remember discussing with a colleague some weeks back on new strategies for our advocacy to curb violence against women and recognized the importance of involving the male folk in the advocacy. When we have more men speaking up against violence against women, the bad eggs will be challenged and victims suffering in silence will be propelled to speak up.

It is really sad that we still witness violence against women in our society and yet many treat it as frivolous. Just last year I was privy to a domestic violence case where the wife finally went to seek divorce in the court after many years of unimaginable batter and while the judgment was given in her Favour, the so-called husband still attacked her in public. The most saddening part was the undue delay by the security outfit to intervene in the matter because they felt it was a "family issue". This incidence and many others gives me more courage to speak up and I am glad to meet more young people with this passion.

hillary24's picture

Totally agree

True, the fact that some authorities may still take their time to act on domestic violence cases, as they may regard them as 'family issues', is very appalling CynthiaM. This why some women may opt to suffer in silence until more grievous things happen simply because they wont be having any confidence in their justice system. That's why we are all voicing now to make sure that every domestic case reported is surely taken seriously by the relevant authorities. Far from being a family issue, domestic violence is certainly a grievous and unacceptable offense.

It takes guts to speak up and on behalf of women's rights and how wrong it is to be silent when women are being abused. We all need to be in solidarity when it comes to standing up for one another and ending all forms of violence.
Thanks for sharing and encouraging others to walk your talk.
In Solidarity,
Robin

It's about time we put an end to domestic violence once and for all, yes!

Some Facts about Domestic Violence are appealing (source: Violence Against Women Online Resources/Copyright © 2010 Violence Against Women Online Resources)
> Domestic Violence Defined
Domestic violence, also known as intimate partner violence, is a pattern of coercive behavior that is used by one person to gain power and control over another. It may include the use of physical and sexual violence, verbal and emotional abuse, stalking and economic abuse. Sexual, emotional and psychological intimidation may also occur. Domestic violence may include:
- Physical Violence
Pushing, shoving, grabbing, slapping, punching, and restraining among other acts
Physical intimidation (blocking doors, throwing objects)
Use of weapons
Stalking (See OVW Stalking Fact Sheet)
- Sexual Abuse
Attacks on sexual parts of the body
Forced sexual activities
Pressure to have sex
Rape (including marital/partner rape)
- Emotional/Psychological/Verbal Abuse
Threats and coercive tactics
Controlling what the victim can and cannot do
Undermining a victim's self-worth and self-esteem
Humiliation, denigration
Threatening to harm or kill a pet
Isolating the victim from family or friends
Blaming the abuse on the victim
Interrogating the victim and their children
Name-calling and yelling
- Economic Abuse
Maintaining control over finances
Withholding access to money
Making the victim financially dependent
Not allowing the victim to work or go to school

Domestic violence occurs within opposite-sex relationships as well as same-sex relationships, between intimate partners who are married, divorced, living together, dating or who were previously in a relationship. It is important to note that "[d]omestic violence not only affects those who are abused, but also has a substantial effect on family members, friends, co-workers, other witnesses and the community at large"(OVW, 2008).

Source: http://www.vaw.umn.edu/documents/inbriefs/domesticviolence/domesticviole...

Kindest regards,

Ana Isabel
fairchange@gmail.com
skype: anaisabelbbp

Thanks Ana and many others for your contributions, they surely go a long way.

MDG's picture

Spread the word

Thank you so much Hilary for your open and frank perspective on domestic violence.

My country is currently in the throes of passing the marriage and divorce bill which has been in the 'oven' for over 40 years. Ironically discussions on the bill underwent a lot of distortion leading to the bill being labelled ' Marriage and property Bill" as many circles in society were opposed to the notion of women having a share of property when they separated from their husbands. Different radical schools of though opined that this would lead to more divorce as women would stand to gain a lot and a break down of the marriage institution. The bill is now back to the drawing board and policy makers have been given 'more' time to consult. Unfortunately the policy makers 'minds' have already been made up and the bill might not see the light of day yet.

I would love to understand from applicants how their respective countries are dealing with issues of divorce, property and empowerment of women.

thanks,

stella.

loretta's picture

you are the man!

I actually had to go back and check you after reading the story. It just didn't sound like it was written by a man on a platform dedicated to Empowering women.
I am not saying there aren't any men who share your views out there, but I completely respect you to come out so strong against it and declare it.

Keep it up Tendayi, you are the man, you are the future. Wow!

Loretta.

Loretta.

A successful woman is one who can build a firm foundation with the bricks others throw at her. Author Unkown.

hillary24's picture

Many thanks

Thank you Loretta and many others who are with me in our quest to curb all forms of domestic violence against women. With all your support we will definitely get the news across. Many thanks indeed.

Wendyiscalm's picture

ZIM MAN

Bwanjji Zim Man,

How's it going, Otto?
Isn't the Mr. Ugly contest coming up soon? You can do just about anything I think, but one thing you can't do is win the Mr. Ugly contest. :) That's meant as a compliment.

Keep up the good work. I think it gets discouraging when people aren't supportive so hope you are getting lots of support.

Thinking of you, Zim Man

Ubuntu,

Wendy

Wendy Stebbins
Founder/CEO
I AM ONE IN A MILLION Non-Profit Organization focused on helping street orphans and vulnerable children in Livingstone, Zambia Africa.

hillary24's picture

You made my day

haha @Wendy,,l'm surprised you know of the Mr Ugly contest in Zimbabwe..it has fast become a very prestigious event of late ...how are you? hope ok.. as for me l've been busy doing road shows and getting more involved with people handson..its always good to hear from you Wendy Stebbins...Ubuntuuuuu

Hi Zim Man,

Great to hear from you.

I am happy to learn you are doing some hands on stuff. Even if small this makes LOTS OF DIFFERENCE. Just going around and meeting people eyeball to eyeball, seeing what their needs are and talking means the world to people who are in a one down position. And you learn a lot you don't learn if you don't do this and can think what to do next at least..

Please when you have time can you tell me more about what you are doing hands on. I am so impressed with your vision and that you don't just "talk shit" as we say in America but take action.

Ubuntu, Otto

Wendy

Wendy Stebbins
Founder/CEO
I AM ONE IN A MILLION Non-Profit Organization focused on helping street orphans and vulnerable children in Livingstone, Zambia Africa.

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