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The Reality on how Fragile Life really is

My eldest sister, Lillian Mmbone died in 2007 at the age of 35 of HIV/AIDS related complications. She left behind 4 kids, 3 girls and a son. Her husband, was quick to remarry, less than a year after her demise and forgot all about their children. I found myself in the role of being a mother to my nieces and nephew, on top of my own 3 kids at the time. It wasn't so hard to add them to my priority responsibilities, since by then, I had been rescuing similar cases for sometime. It was also comforting to know that in as much as they had been abandoned by their dad, he was still available, albeit as a live memory to relate to as a father figure. They used to talk on phone and life continued as usual.
At the time of my sister's death, her eldest daughter was just about to sit her final primary school exams. She did not perform so well, but I still managed to enroll her in high school the following year. It came as a shock when in her third year of high school, she dropped out of school due to succumbing to peer pressure that resulted in an unplanned for pregnancy. She made me a grandmother in 2010, to a bouncing baby girl, whose father is unknown to date. I coerced her not to give up and enrolled her at The Nanny School, which was a project run by my boss, Lindy Wafula, where she was equipped with skills in home management. She succumbed again and this time graduated from college with a baby boy in her months, who had been born a month to graduation, and whose dad also remains a mystery.
Meanwhile, her sister had also sat and passed her exams well and I also enrolled her into high school, only for her to succumb and give birth to a baby boy, making me a 3 time granny of a baby whose dad refused to accept parental responsibility. I plan to enroll her for a vocational course, though I would be very happy if she decides to go back to school.
It is sad that my nephew, their 15 year old brother is also HIV positive, though I thank God that he is on ARVs. His little sister 13 now, escaped and is negative.
It is so unfortunate that 2 days ago, my brother in law, their father, passed away too, and was buried yesterday under the Muslim law. His son was hit hardest, he mourned his father like I have never seen anyone do, it was heart breaking. He had 2 very hard questions for me.
1. Why did daddy have to die when mama is already dead, Mummy?
2. You've taught me otherwise, but am I also going to die soon? I really don't want to leave my sisters without a man to look up to.
I cried, I really did.
Life is way too short. We gotta do all the best we can for those around us, before we end up wishing for what would never come to pass.

Comments

jacollura's picture

You are the amazing one. I

You are the amazing one. I admire your strength and resilience.

Phionah Musumba's picture

Thankyou, Julie. Someone has

Thankyou, Julie. Someone has to do something.

Phy
Centre for Disadvantaged Girls, Kenya
www.galsissues.blogspot.com
https://www.facebook.com/MalkiaCDG

jacollura's picture

Keep it up. I am with you.

Keep it up. I am with you.

Phionah Musumba's picture

Thanks, Julie. You are so

Thanks, Julie. You are so kind.

Phy
Centre for Disadvantaged Girls, Kenya
www.galsissues.blogspot.com
https://www.facebook.com/MalkiaCDG

Kim Crane's picture

Phionah, this is a

Phionah, this is a heartbreaking post. I am so sorry to hear about the misfortunes in your family. And I am so impressed with your efforts to take care of the girls in your family and give them a fighting chance. I hope you find resources and a supportive community around you to hold you up through these difficult times. And know that there are people across the world wishing you and your family well!

Kim

Phionah Musumba's picture

Thanks a bunch, Kim. I don't

Thanks a bunch, Kim. I don't view my situation as a misfortune as such, but experience. My sister's brush with HIV/AIDS opened not only my eyes, but my arms and heart too, to guys who are affected by and/or infected with the same. It is easier to talk to and associate with them, because they share their agony freely, knowing that as the listener, I can relate to what they are going through.

Phy
Centre for Disadvantaged Girls, Kenya
www.galsissues.blogspot.com
https://www.facebook.com/MalkiaCDG

Thanks a bunch, Kim. I don't view my situation as a misfortune as such, but experience. My sister's brush with HIV/AIDS opened not only my eyes, but my arms and heart too, to guys who are affected by and/or infected with the same. It is easier to talk to and associate with them, because they share their agony freely, knowing that as the listener, I can relate to what they are going through.

Phy
Centre for Disadvantaged Girls, Kenya
www.galsissues.blogspot.com
https://www.facebook.com/MalkiaCDG

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