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A case file gaining dust

The poor tribal woman travelling in a train was found strangulated and hanging from a tree

Jan 13, Bihar, India

In Bhagalpur, Bihar, the central part of India a woman bound on a train heading for Delhi with her son, was found hanging from a tree disrobed partially, with liquor bottles all around her. The media first plunged on the angle of a gang rape, which has been rubbished by the post-mortem results which deny that possibility. The media and the people in India say that it's just another case of suicide then.

Post- mortem reports says no rape has occured and media blames it on her for taking her own life by suggesting SUICIDE. It serves no purpose for law to even pursue another angle because in India blame-the-woman psyche runs deeper than the reality and atrocity against women.

It's not persuasive enough to believe that a woman would get down from a running train to commit suicide. Certainly, there is foul play and when it revolves around the plight of a poor woman in the country, we can expect no justice. Just another case file gaining dust.

In a school at Rohini Village, Wardha, Maharashtra, interrractingwith adolescent girls(For you Wendy)
Me at the school at Rohini( For you Wendy)
The drinking water provision for school children at Rohini, Wardha, Maharashtra, is glasses tied to the tank, seldom washed and water is hardly cleared or cleaned( For you Wendy)
A focus discussion underway on menstruation and hygiene in a school among adolescent girls (For you Wendy)

Comments

Wendyiscalm's picture

WHAT TO SAY

Oh Urmila,

I don't know what to say to your article and picture. I am sick inside and outside angry that I cannot correct more of the problems of the world. I think it is SO important for YOU to "keep it in our face" as we say in America which means keep on keeping on with these horror stories so that eventually enough people will band together to help.
I assume the picture of you with the two boys is you and your sons. You are blessed and I pray that you and your family will be always safe and that your world will change in the not so distant future, one step at a time.

Ubuntu (I am who I am because of whowe are together),

Wendy

Wendy Stebbins
Founder/CEO
I AM ONE IN A MILLION Non-Profit Organization focused on helping street orphans and vulnerable children in Livingstone, Zambia Africa.

Urmila Chanam's picture

I am one in a million NGO

Dear sister Wendy,

This picture captures so many things not just the crime. It captures the vulnerability of an Indian woman, the gross insensitivity regarding what becomes of her at the hand of men. We could do a lot, if you really give it a thought. World pulse allows us to unify our voices.

Trust me a clear, loud voice is a big deterrent to whats going on in our society. So let us stand together sister.

The two children are not boys- only one is. They are not my boys, though i wish they were! I met them in my travel to remote parts of India on work. This was in a place called Rohini Village in Wardha, Maharashtra in India. Look it up but am sure even google doesn't have it as its really remote.

I travel a lot to rural and remote India as 73% of India's population lives in villages that are denied even basic amenities that we in urban India take it granted for!

Do keep in close touch.

Love
Urmila Chanam
Bangalore
India

It takes just one to change many

Hi Urmila,

I wanted to read up on Rohini Village as you suggested before responding. I was amazed. There are no pictures even. But I work in rural Zambia and I think it is the same. Pictures would not do it justice. You have to smell the smells, feel the air, see with your own eyes. I was intrigued with your article that addressed the taboo of menstruation and was shocked at the content of your article. It has to be a horror for girls/women. I took notes on the article to see if there are similar problems in Zambia. I think there must be. I also read your article on Voice For Human Rights about the 15 year old murdered. I was impressed with the work of Dr. Abhay and Rani Bang also in Wardha. Are you impressed with them?

I researched Wardha Maharashtra as you suggested. Just let me say, I think you are amazing and have a great future ahead of you to be a life and world changer. You have what it takes in many ways, not the least of which is intelligence, spirit, passion, compassion, and committment. I am sure your goals are moving ahead slower than you wish, but you will get there.

Ubuntu(I am who I am because of who we are together),

Wendy

Wendy Stebbins
Founder/CEO
I AM ONE IN A MILLION Non-Profit Organization focused on helping street orphans and vulnerable children in Livingstone, Zambia Africa.

Dear Wendy,

Let me take you to this special village called Rohini 'Gawn' meaning village in Hindi. It is some 20 km from Wardha in Maharashtra on a jeep-able road. I went there for a program on imparting sensitization to adolescent girls studying in the school there on menstrual hygiene, and to understand the level of information the girls possessed on it and the provisions available for them.

To my surprise, I found the biggest hindrance is the taboo around menstruation where girls can't even approach their teacher to go home (nearby) to change their menstruation cloth or take sick leave if they have cramps. The pathetic state of the school toilet with poor design, no running water further ensures girls don't come to school during those days of the month. Infact, school drop outs among girls in India on reaching puberty is because of this.

Hope I helped in throwing some light on the situation in Rohini Village and hundreds of such villages in India where taboo and stigma, till today, is the biggest hindrance to health options for women and girls.

I am posting some pictures for you in this post of Rohini Village and the adolescent girls who live in these situations jut for your insight. Seeing is knowing!

Thank you for your kind word of encouragement sister.

Love
Urmila Chanam

It takes just one to change many

Wendyiscalm's picture

Thanks Sister Urmila,

Hi Urmila,

Thanks for the information. I will look for the pictures and appreciate your going the extra mile to do this. I feel your passion and energy.

I would be curious to hear your impressions of the two Doctors who are making a difference.

I hope the day will come when you or someone will be able to MAKE MORE VISIBLE on a larger scale the problems about menstruation as people like me, and most people who are not in that environment, know nothing about this. It really needs to be made more public because if it becomes an issue that people know about SOMEONE will take it to the next level, knowing the right people, along with yourself, to get rid of this problem. I am going to take it up with the women and girls I know in Zambia when I go back in March. I will keep you posted on the conversations. It will be most interesting. But if you had not brought this to my attention it would never have entered my mind to do this.

I wonder if it would make sense to have someone who makes menstruation pads (we call them sanitary napkins) or tampax send a truck load of them to that village or will that make it worse for the women and girls?

Ubuntu(I am who I am because of who we are together),

Wendy

Wendy Stebbins
Founder/CEO
I AM ONE IN A MILLION Non-Profit Organization focused on helping street orphans and vulnerable children in Livingstone, Zambia Africa.

Urmila Chanam's picture

Big or Small- A Change

Dear Wendy,

I am most delighted at the prospect of you talking about this among women and adolescent girls in your own community- the change you so desired has already taken place, right in front of your eyes! I encourage you to investigate the situation of menstrual hygiene, management and disposal in your community and I would be happy to assist you with support in terms of the guidelines and best practices.

I believe now is the time for us to engage in studying just how bad it is, and the factors driving this. We must put the entire picture together and then have multiple approach to solving it and bringing about a behavioral change.

To encourage us in this, a movement is already underway here In India. I am glad to be a part of it, spending sizable amount of time in a year travelling to the worst hit zones in my country, holding surveys among our sample and sensitizing the girls and the women. Hopefully, one day out of these number analysis and the many many awareness camps , a strong advocacy program will germinate , changing policies, health infra structure and the provisions for menstruation readily available.

A short term supply of menstruation cloth or sanitary pads will not serve the purpose, in my opinion.

Looking forward to your interest and work on making these small changes for now, my sister!!

GREAT IS WORLD PULSE!!!!!!!!!!!!

In Solidarity,
Urmila Chanam,
Bangalore
India
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/urmila.ch

It takes just one to change many

Wendyiscalm's picture

You are my miracle this week !

Hi Urmila,

Thank you for your response. I love your idea of guiding me. This will help me be effective. Let me put it this way, when I first started working with street orphans,the first trip, I looked around and realized I did not understand the population, customs, traditions or the people. I knew the first step was to get inside them and do a study. I did a four year study to understand them because I knew the value of respecting who they were and their needs, etc.

So, with that in mind. I leave for my next rip on March 25 arriving March 27 and because I go each month I will only be there 12 days this time. So, what can I begin to do NOW to prepare for that. What must I know. There is not much on the internet, because this is a secret.

What are some of your beginning suggestions? I know two or three "professional" Zambian women. Are there questions I could ask them in the meantime. Should I somehow try to get a group of the poor women together to begin a dialogue? Or do I talk to them individually? I am thinking about all this. All I know right now, with my limited knowledge, is that I WILL begin a dialogue. I need help to know how to ask them things. I tend to be too direct, if you know what I mean. Or maybe that is best. I do not know.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Ubuntu (I am who I am because of who we are together).

Wendy

Wendy Stebbins
Founder/CEO
I AM ONE IN A MILLION Non-Profit Organization focused on helping street orphans and vulnerable children in Livingstone, Zambia Africa.

Dear Sister Wendy,

I would suggest you identify a strong cohesive women group in the community you are going to be living with- it could be a self help group, an association, a society or even an NGO. Then you could tell them clearly that it interests you how women look after their hygiene and health in menstruation in their community and give a summary of how it is in your own community. This inititial conversation should be warm, interractive and very informal. This would be the only way you could penetrate this sensitive topic.

Now the purpose of your interest has to be made clear and your integrity should be convincing. At no point of time should there be suspicion from the subject. You could try and probe if any woman has suffered from itching or any other ailment. You could even do some online research if any kind of ailment has been linked to poor menstual hygiene management in your country. In India menstruation and its poor management has resulted in high drop outs among adolescent girls, so you can say it directly impacts education of the girls! Besides this, there are several bad practices like using ash as menstraution flyuid control medium in rural India when you thought the rest of the world is using sanitary pads. You could draw out your own talking points now that you know from me which line of investigation you must follow, my dear sisiter.

I wish you the best. I now believe there is an appointed time for everything good. Now that the movement is gaining momentum in my country, I am joyous to see your interest. We would together, perhaps, arrive at the big picture, one day, sister!

Looking forward to your reply.

Love always,
Urmila Chanam,
Bangalore

It takes just one to change many

Wendyiscalm's picture

Thanks Urmila,

Thanks Urmila.

Urmila, a thought came to me as I was walking around. Do you think one of the reasons some girls get pregnant early is so they won't menstruate/ That thought just came to me. I know they would menstruate after 9 months, but the population I know do not think beyond their nose because that is all they know, survival of the moment. I would be interested in your opinion of this.

I will think about everything you said,suggested Am sure I will have more questions. The people in Livingstone do not help each other and do NOT want to BUT I am thinking that most of the social worker groups are run by men BUT I know a woman social worker from the Department of Ministry that I once sent clothes to for the poor and did a video interview with named Gwen. Or I know as I am writing another woman who used to be Public Relations Director at the Golf Club in this then third world country. So, I am thinking. Catherine formerly with the Golf Course is poor but I can be honest with her as we had developed a good relationship and then lost it when she stole the money for food from my orphans. believe it or not, she is the best one. She is very very wanting to get back in a relationship with me and she has contacts. I will even email one of my street orphans after I have done research to have them find her and get her phone number so we can set up a meeting in March.

Thanks. I am sure I will be back in touch with questions once I have done some research before March 25th.

If God isn't working through us to bring us together for this purpose, I don't know who is !

UBUNTU ( I am who I am because of who we are together),

Wendy

Wendy Stebbins
Founder/CEO
I AM ONE IN A MILLION Non-Profit Organization focused on helping street orphans and vulnerable children in Livingstone, Zambia Africa.

Dear Wendy,

The desire to not menstruate and stop it naturally by allowing a pregnancy, is a value system, which would have to be studied in the context of your society. Who knows!!!!

However, in all my interrractions with adolescent girls, who we ask, " Do you like it when you menstruate? What is the emotion- do you feel happy or irritable?" Till today, I haven't got a response where the girl has enjoyed menstruation. Let's face it- it's messy!

Our vision however is not to change that view but to allow girls to learn how to practice hygienic menstrauion options and dispose in a safe and environment friendly way. Also create an environment conducive to this by sensitizing women, school teachers and so on to rise above the stigma and taboo and talk about menstraution.

I will back you up sister, go sister, go sister!

Love
Urmila Chanam
Bangalore

It takes just one to change many

Wendyiscalm's picture

Your comments

Hi Urmila,

Thank you for your very informative message. I really take it all to heart. I really like your last paragraph where you give me an idea of a context in which I can begin a conversation with women I know and move from there. That paragraph was very helpful in my thinking of how to word things and questions.

Urmila, I was shocked. I went online to find information about Zambian women and their menstruating. There was NOTHING and I spent a lot of time. There was one article written in October 2012 by a student getting her Bachelors degree in which she talked about it because it sounded like she was doing a research paper on it. And there were three coments ONE WAS FROM A WOMAN In Zambia who said the rural people use cloths. But that is All that was available.

Interesting when I googled Menstruation of Zambian Women and things similar, the computer gave me LOTS of articles on period of life in history. So, the computer knows period as a connection to menstruation.

I am sure I will have questions as I think about this and my March trip. You are a Godsend. Thanks, Urmila.

Ubuntu,

Wendy

Wendy Stebbins
Founder/CEO
I AM ONE IN A MILLION Non-Profit Organization focused on helping street orphans and vulnerable children in Livingstone, Zambia Africa.

Urmila Chanam's picture

All the best sister!

Dear Wendy,

Male journalists will not write on menstruation and girl/women journalists are not bold enough to do too!!!!! That is a reality. I came across an educated, Army officer, who appeared well read and well spoken with knowledge on wide topics but had no idea about menstruation!

He asked me what it was!

This is why at some point of time, we need to deliberately nurture women journalists so that they can take issues close to women to the fore!

Love and hugs,
Urmila Chanam

It takes just one to change many

Wendyiscalm's picture

THANKS URMILA

Hi Urmila,

Hope this finds you well and happy.

Very interesting, but not surprising about male journalists. I already have sent messages to my street orphans to locate Catherine, the lady I know and can be open with. So when I am there hopefully, if she is not away, we can talk. Her being a native, she will know what is going on and some simple step it makes sense to take. I will also talk to women in general of course and I am SURE I will be back in touch with questions. It is great to have you as a help.

Thanks, Urmila.

Wendy

P.S. This population does NOT trust white American women. But I keep coming back and over the years it has gotten better. The kids are still taught in school that Americans injected the first HIV/AIDS into people and that they should watch out that we don't do that. I got this from a male, my best friend who turned on me one day. But I do not give up.

Wendy Stebbins
Founder/CEO
I AM ONE IN A MILLION Non-Profit Organization focused on helping street orphans and vulnerable children in Livingstone, Zambia Africa.

JaniceW's picture

Of interest to you both

Urmila and Wendy,

I have enjoyed reading your conversation about addressing the stigma around menstruation and on how to help women reasonably manage this time of the month. I wanted to bring to your attention the story of a man in India who has created an inexpensive sanitary pad that is produced on a low-cost machine that he also designed.

He doesn’t sell his product commercially. His company helps rural women buy one of the $2,500 machines through NGOs, government loans, and rural self-help groups. By investing in the machine, the women can form their own business that then provides income and employment.

I have posted information about Mr. Muruganantham in my journal (see below link) rather than post it here. It's an inspiring story about a man who has started a sanitary napkin revolution!

http://worldpulse.com/node/64533

Dear Janice,

This is why I love to be on WORLD PULSE!!!! Look at this wonderful way we three are now connected on a cause on women health and dignity. Thank you for contributing to our discussion and the important information on the possibility of making low cost sanitary pads.

In India, 73% of the population lives in villages and from my experience, most women and adolescent girls use cotton cloth to absorb menstrual fluid. There is this wonderful NGO, Goonj which collects used clothes from people and recycles them into cotton pads to be used for the purpose of menstruation, They then distribute it to the women who need them. A lot of organizations like Goonj have understood what would work in our country and approached it that way.

Official website: http://goonj.org/

I am so glad we are talking about it and sharing the situation specific to our countries!!

Love and regards,
Urmila Chanam

It takes just one to change many

Urmila Chanam's picture

Let's do this

Dear Sister Wendy,

The prejudice, suspicion, distrust and resistance to a good initiative on the grounds of religion, community, skin color or political affinity are things that we as change makers in India struggle with, while working at the grass root everyday! You must remember India is a country where every 100 km the language changes and the community so working here is like working in different countries. So I truly understand your challenge and I wish you power sister!!!

In faith
Urmila Chanam
Bangalore

It takes just one to change many

Wendyiscalm's picture

Thank you dear friend

Urmila,

I always LOVE when you enlighten me about the way it is in India. I feel a special afffinity for this country.

Bill Gates said something I will always remember: He was talking about Africa but it could be India I think. He said:
"To make even one little decision, many many many factors have to all line up all at the same time, while you are in a headwind".

That is why I did a four year study before I got too involved in making change. I think the most important thing is to understand the particular culture, traditions, desires, needs, values, and many more things. That cannot be rushed because people do not trust outsiders. I think my greatest asset was tha I kept coming back often and took the time to get behind their eyeballs without trying to get anybody to change. It is such a multi-layered problem that takes time to "get".

Have a good day, Urmila.

Wendy

Wendy Stebbins
Founder/CEO
I AM ONE IN A MILLION Non-Profit Organization focused on helping street orphans and vulnerable children in Livingstone, Zambia Africa.

Urmila Chanam's picture

Trust and study

Dear Wendy,

A big hello! How are you, sister? The date of your travel is coming close and I am keen to learn of the outcome of the study you wish to undertake.

From my experience, I would like to share how distrust and suspicion or even discomfort is the biggest hindrance to mix around with your subject of study and all your good will and intent can come to a HALT if you are unable to win trust. And then again, winning trust is not something you do ALONE consciously so it's sometimes out of your control.

Today I went to reach out to a special community of Transgenders here in my city for understanding if a particular program was functioning well among them or not, and to hear from them, the most pressing issue among them. But I found that they were uncomfortable and suspicious on first meeting me, and that is justified!

I could sense the atmosphere. So from years of training, I applied one logic- whenever, your subjects are uncomfortable, throw the schedule out of your mind,and the reason why you came (the purpose of work) and just be a friend. So I didn't open my voice recorder, camera, video or a note pad to scribble that I would have done ordinarily.
In some time, few of them opened up. One got me tea. One showed me what they do. Another shared pictures. One told me of his problem in getting a job. Though at the end of the day when I walked out of there, I had nothing documented I had earned some trust!

I could work later!!

Love always,
Urmila Chanam
Bangalore

It takes just one to change many

JaniceW's picture

Earning their trust

I have no doubt that they sensed your respect for them and that in time, they will open up to you and share their stories. And meanwhile, I eagerly look forward to reading your article.

Dear Janice,

It's been so good to have you with us in this conversation. Please feel free to write to me at urmila.chanam@gmail.com

I am involved with the sexual minorities over a program and would also be writing on it. Would love to share it with you. Please remember this will be in the Indian context and I cannot speak on any other community other than in mine.

Kindly find this link of a story very dear to me on transgenders

http://www.thesangaiexpress.com/tseitm-13924-pink-pages-and-the-hammam/

Hope to hear more from you.

In solidarity,
Urmila Chanam
Bangalore

It takes just one to change many

JaniceW's picture

Thank you

I look forward to reading the article. I also sent you an email from my personal email address so let me know if you did not receive it. Wishing you a wonderful weekend. In peace,
Janice

Dear Janice,

I got your e-mail when I was traveling in a city bus, squashed between dozen of women and no space to move! I traveled far yesterday to go to Drop in Centre, an association of Transgenders in Bangalore where they assemble to share and plan their activities. After a hard day's work, your words were so rich in affection and upbuilding, my love!

You cheered me.

Love always
Urmila Chanam
Bangalore

It takes just one to change many

JaniceW's picture

Such a powerful story

You use your words so beautifully to capture the lives of the hijra. You MUST post this article into your journal so that many more may read it. It is so powerful.

You brought Sahana's world to life and deeply moved me with the imagery you created. I feel at once connected to her yet also very distant in that I have no reference in which to place myself in her shoes. Once you post the story into your journal, we can chat more about this. I have so many questions.

Thank you for all you are doing to shed light on the lives of those who are rarely seen or heard. In sisterhood,
Janice

Urmila Chanam's picture

So I will my sister

Dear Janice,

My relationship with the 'Hijra's of India has been personal, till some time back. I saw them as I grew up, coming to our homes, offering to dance on occasions for the sake of few 'rupees' and banished out of our life. Then one day our eyes met, and I saw something very empty there.

I changed inside.

I am posting my story on my WP Journal for the benefit of all my sisters here. If there is any one who would care for India's 'hijras' it will be my World Pulse sisters!

Thank you for the idea.

Love always
Urmila Chanam
Bangalore

It takes just one to change many

Wendyiscalm's picture

Thanks Janice

This is kind of amazing on two levels. One the machine itself. Two that a man is sensitive to and involved in this.

Thanks, Janice.

Wendy

Wendy Stebbins
Founder/CEO
I AM ONE IN A MILLION Non-Profit Organization focused on helping street orphans and vulnerable children in Livingstone, Zambia Africa.

Wendyiscalm's picture

Urmila

Hi Friend,

I enjoyed your latest experience and appreciate your sharing it. While my focus is on my street orphans and especially my roof project I will take time to include a little time to begin a dialogue about our concern with women. I am not worried about the trust part. I am the kind of person that for some reason people trust me quickly and it is God given. I think it is partly my authenticity, humor and self-depriating way. I figure if I can get a Special Forces counter-terrorist expert for the USA government based in the UK to volunteer all about his sex life with a sex therapist (which I did), I can get anyone to talk about anything. That has always been one of my strong suits. While this is not the purpose of my trip, I will be sure to get some info. I do not stay with them. I travel first class on the airplane and stay in a plush hotel. Why? Because I deserve it.

Talk to you soon.

Ubuntu,

Wendy

Wendy Stebbins
Founder/CEO
I AM ONE IN A MILLION Non-Profit Organization focused on helping street orphans and vulnerable children in Livingstone, Zambia Africa.

Wendyiscalm's picture

A resource

Hi Urmila,

Forgot to tell you I have a good resource in Livingstone Zambia = the Sisters/Nuns of St. Mary's Private Girls Secondary School. When I bring all the books I bring each time for their library I will be sure to set up a meeting to talk with the nuns. They have 650 girls and are very open to me as we have built up a trust level over many years. They had my birthday party last year. Also, I have a good relationship with the Director of Labasi Home for Orphans and she and the teachers will be most happy to talk to me intimately about this. So, it is beginning to come together.

Like Mother Teresa said, if something is supposed to be it will come together easily, if it doesn't it is not supposed to be.

Again, appreciate your help.

Wendy

Wendy Stebbins
Founder/CEO
I AM ONE IN A MILLION Non-Profit Organization focused on helping street orphans and vulnerable children in Livingstone, Zambia Africa.

Urmila Chanam's picture

Hats off to you sister!

Dear Wendy,

I am fascinated by you and I loved, "....because I deserve it." I wish in India women believed that about themselves!

Love
Urmila Chanam
Bangalore

It takes just one to change many

Wendyiscalm's picture

Love the pictures

Urmila,

Forgot to say, I LOVE the new pictures you have added to your story. Very very thought provoking.I think when people look at all our pictures their thought must certainly be "Why aren't I doing more?" Youa re surely a catalyst.

Wendy

Wendy Stebbins
Founder/CEO
I AM ONE IN A MILLION Non-Profit Organization focused on helping street orphans and vulnerable children in Livingstone, Zambia Africa.

Urmila Chanam's picture

Pictures- a million stories

Dear Wendy,

I love pictures sister, they tell a million stories when words fail you. I wish to learn to take better quality pictures and am no great photographer. I take all the pictures for all my stories and content yet I know I have room for lot of improvement.I once read on a Facebook blog post that applies to me-" If you have a camera that doesn't make you a photographer, it just makes you its owner!! " :) :)

I wish to graduate from being an owner to a professional. Are you a good photographer??

Love and hugs
Urmila Chanam
Bangalore

It takes just one to change many

Wendyiscalm's picture

THANK YOU

Hi again, Urmila,

I JUST saw the pictures you downloaded for me in particular just after I sent a message a minute ago.. First I am so moved, almost to tears, that you would care enough to send those especially to me. Thank you so so much. They are very very good and you DO have the makings of a great photographer because of your inner spirit. You have a knack to know when to click the camera and what to capture. Most of us do not. I will look them over even more in a while but I have to say again Thank you. They tell a story.

Love,

Wendy

Wendy Stebbins
Founder/CEO
I AM ONE IN A MILLION Non-Profit Organization focused on helping street orphans and vulnerable children in Livingstone, Zambia Africa.

Urmila Chanam's picture

A reason to smile

Dear Wendy,

I would rather be the reason of your smile, and for your joy. So tell me when you smiled because of me, and wipe your tears.

I liked what you said about capturing a moment on camera, an emotion and I wish I do it till the last day of my life. If there is anything beautiful in this life, it's that ONE MOMENT IN TIME. There are just so many when I close my eyes.

Have a great week ahead sister!

All my love
Urmila Chanam
Bangalore

It takes just one to change many

Y's picture

I believe we MUST include

I believe we MUST include menstruation and child birth truths in the studies of young men. I did this with my own son, and am much criticized by others for doing so, even in the twenty-first century in the United States of America. He is a loving husband and father to a son AND a daughter. I know that my discussions with him have made him more compassionate and responsible.

Yvette

Dear Y,

You have set an example. We all must take this role. Thank you for sharing.

Love and hugs
Urmila Chanam
India

It takes just one to change many

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