Ita

Hi Rahma,

Thank you for sharing the story of Ita and women like her in Java. As women, so many traditional roles fall upon us. We are mothers, daughters, friends and wives. We are caretakers, child bearers, house cleaners, cooks. We provide emotional support, love, tenderness and advice. But when women like Ita seek to also have professional careers, to contribute to the finances of the family and to contribute to society with their talents, they should not be held back.

I hope that this traditional role for women in Java can change to include professional work and that possibly the traditional role of men can also change to include support that is not just financial, but supporting their wives in the choices they make.

Warm regards,
Jade

Rahma... it is so interesting to read about the traditional roles of women in other countries. I am of Chinese descent and know a lot about the cultural expectations of women. Even though I grew up in New Zealand, some criticized my parents for educating my sister and I, as traditionally it is considered a waste of money as the daughters marry out of the family (and thus no longer provide value to their family) and once married, they become housewives so have no need for education. In fact, it only causes trouble as then the wife speaks her mind. It has taken many generations for educated women to find a place in marriage as in the past (and still today, in some instances), the husbands feel ashamed and lose face when their wives speak out, are independent or do not agree with or submit to their husband's will. It is seen as the husband not being able to control his wife.

Thank you for your story and I hope it encourages others to share their stories about the role of women in their country or culture. Best wishes to you.