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"Forgiveness gives us the capacity to make a new start. And forgiveness is the grace by which you enable the other person to get up, and get up with dignity, to begin anew...In the act of forgiveness we are declaring our faith in the future of a relationship and in the capacity of the wrongdoer to change."

Archbishop Desmond Tutu said this.

Wendy Stebbins


Amei's picture

FORGIVING is a challenge!

Hi Wendy. I am total agreement with ADT. I hope people learn to forgive.

I once read A person who can conqure anger/sadness and forgive is the noblest of all. I feel there is a truth in this.

Until I forgive and move on I have not been be truly happy. I know when I have forgiven. I do not feel the notching of my stomach or the racing of my heart beat or the dryness of the throat when they come to mymind or to my environment. These physical signs are not there when I remember a person who has put me in asituation that I have to forgive them.

Forgiving is a key ingridient to keep healthy and happy. We have to remind people of forgiving more often than we do now.

Love, Amei

Wendyiscalm's picture


Dear Amei,

Thank you for addressing this issue. I believe you have the right attitude.

My problem has been in the past that I forgive TOO soon. Like when someone invalidates me, or really does something hurtful I forgive TOO soon without first feeling the process of anger and then forgiveness. Of course, it doesn't have to be intense anger or for a long time, but it has to be that I recognize what someone did to me instead of constantly putting up with it. Or learning to say, "Please do not talk to me that way again". So, my problem was the opposite. However, where I have a problem still is in not forgiving MYSELF. That is the hard one for me.

Love ya,


Wendy Stebbins
I AM ONE IN A MILLION Non-Profit Organization focused on helping street orphans and vulnerable children in Livingstone, Zambia Africa.

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