Yes, I am good... and yes, I AM LOVED!
I was thinking about my mother today. I love her very much but have always tried to please her by doing everything perfectly. I just wanted my mother to notice me and to love me just as I am. I excelled in everything I did. I thought, “maybe she’ll notice of me if make her laugh”. And, “If I do well in sports and join every extra curricular activity at school, THEN she’ll notice me and see that I’m a good daughter. Yes, a “good daughter”, that’s what I wanted to be. If she would just notice me THEN she’d see that I am a good girl, THEN she would love me. The little Pam spent a lot of time outside herself and apart from her heart. She felt disconnected from the precious knowing of her true relationship to Mother, God.
Well, here I am many years later with the full realization that I AM NOTICED. That I AM GOOD. And that I AM LOVED. How did I cultivate this “knowing”? First of all I was tired of feelings of loneliness, sadness, low self-esteem and the “I’m not good enough” tape playing in my head. I began to understand and align with my divine Mother. I knew I could get attention from Her. I wrote down the qualities that I felt constituted the kind of mother I wanted. Qualities such as undivided attention, kindness, companionship, playfulness, unconditional love and many, many more just flowed out of me onto the page. I felt liberated because I began to understand that these qualities were always with me wherever I went. That I actually embodied these qualities. I could forgive my earthly mother simply because she was doing the best she could. BUT I learned to praise my heavenly, ever present Mother for all that She was becoming to me. Yes, I am noticed. Yes, I am good. And, yes, I am loved . . . . everyday in every way.