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A Burning Desire

It all started with a desire to be different from most young women in the small community I grew up, a desire to encourage my friends who didn’t see reasons why the girl child should be schooled as it was a common practice amongst the people at that time. The desire to speak for and help others even when it got me into trouble. It was this desire that saw me through school. I could remember the smile on faces of my parents when I graduated and started work as a trainee in a media outfit in a commercial city, from where I grew to become a channel manager.
Working as a producer (in the News & Current Affairs department) opened my eyes to a lot of domestic violence and human rights abuses against women and children especially.

I could remember a domestic violence case in 2004 which lead to the death of Mrs Okonkwo, a mother of three who slumped and died after her husband’s battering. Prior to her death her family advised that she remain in the marriage because of the children when she attempted to filing for a divorce, the authorities also advised they settle on family level. No legal action was taken against Mr Okonkwo after her death, he probably roaming the street free and maybe married to another woman.

A few months ago it was a female banker Titilayo Arowolo she was in her late twenties with a daughter of two, got married in 2008. She was stabbed to death and her body mutilated by her husband Kolade Arowolo. No judgment has been passed on him yet but with the way the case is going, he is likely to go scot-free.

There are several cases of children abused by their parents. Yesterday I read of a woman Rebecca Emmanuel she was sentenced to death for poisoning her 9 year old son whom she had out of wedlock and burnt the corpse so that no one can recognize the body. And I am wondering how long will these continue? Who will speak for victims of such circumstances? What should women do when their rights are being trampled upon?

This is the reason I live, this is the reason I do what I do as a journalist to help amplify the voices of women and children in pain, this is reason I am developing a talk show/counseling programme. I want to see women fully aware of their basic rights and responsibilities. It is my desire that more men in my community become responsibly husbands and fathers. It is my desire that people get the right counsel and authorities wake up to the responsibilities for which they were set up. It is my desire that women speak up without fear or intimidation.

I know that becoming a VOF correspondent will help me fine-tune and develop new ideas in reaching out to my community, network and learn from other women who have succeeded in carrying out awareness campaigns in their communities and have amplified their voices for change. It will give me the rare privilege to tell my stories and express myself better as I learn, impact, share knowledge and experiences and draw strength and courage from others.

In life I have come to realize that we have the power to make whatever change we desire if only we can look inwards.

It all starts with a desire.



Adepeju's picture

Hello sis, good vision you

Hello sis, good vision you have up there for the Nigerian woman. Cases of domestic violence and child abuse are on the increase and we need courageous women like you to speak up. All the best in the selection process.

Queenette's picture

Thank you Adepeju it is true

Thank you Adepeju it is true that such is in the increase and but I know that with the new media more women will be more aware of their rights and privileges.

I read year story and I was really touched I equally like your area of concentration because I know not much has been done in that area in Nigeria. Wish you all the best, hoping that we will meet some day soon.


Lagos, Nigeria

Maggs's picture

Let that desire burn and

Let that desire burn and envelope you and fuel your purpose.

Big things always start small.

Good luck!


Queenette's picture

thank you

Yes Maggs, big things always starts small and I promise it will burn and thanks for the encouragement, women like you help to bring out the best in others.

Lagos, Nigeria

gaurav.nakhare's picture

Dearest Queenette, Wow! Your

Dearest Queenette,

Wow! Your article is extremely impressive, and I was moved both by your instances and the positive vision that you exhort. I hope to see you on your way to fulfilling this 'desire', and wish you all the best!


Gaurav Nakhare
WP Listener

Queenette's picture

Thank you Gaurav for your

Thank you Gaurav for your encouragement, desire is the only this that keeps a man going, life is worthless without desires and am glad to know that you find my write up impressive. I promise, this desire will continue to burn because it is woth living for.

I also hope to hear more from you.

Lagos, Nigeria

Sandra Nassali's picture

Dear Queenette, your story

Dear Queenette, your story was worth writing home about. And reading it made me realise the more we need platforms like PulseWire that allow us to voice such issues with no fear. Women have continued to be abused in all forms, yet justices eludes the pertetrators like you mentioned.

I believe the more we bring it in the open, the more likely we are to see the change we want to see...we living harmoniously with men, and with equal rights as well. Religious leaders world over have continued to encourage women to stay in abusive relationships for the case of respect and children. And this has resulted into death in extreme cases. I am from Uganda, and hardly a week goes by with out such things happening in our country. Media houses have continued to report about such cases but funny thing is they never cease out and this means alot needs to be done.

I think more sensitization about women and human rights is needed, and with web 2.0 technologies in place...we have no excuse.



nargiz's picture

Good luck with the selection

Good luck with the selection process! And thank you for sharing you vision. I completely agree - nothing can be more important for women's empowerment than education and solidarity.

Queenette's picture

True Talk

True Sandra, the more we bring our stories to the open the more likely we are to see change, more women are opening up by the day and people are getting more enlightened as this is already happening in Nigeria.

And with 2.0 technologies in place we indeed have no excuse.

Lagos, Nigeria

Queenette's picture

How are you doing Nargiz,

How are you doing Nargiz, nothing can be more than education as that is the key to freedom especially as it relates to Women. Hoping to hear more from you.

Lagos, Nigeria

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