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Claiming My Gift & My Strength

For as long as I can remember, I have been intuitive, receiving "hits" about things to come. And for almost that long, I've tried to push this ability away, convinced on some level that it will make me different from other people, somehow less able to fit in. When I told others about the vivid images I saw on my wall as a child, adults laughed about my "active imagination." When I relayed the words I heard in my ears, people's faces changed as they edged away, frightened on some level by what I could do.

As I grew into my teenage years, I tried to push my intuition away with drugs and alcohol, but it would always return like a stubborn neighbor when I woke up. My intuition was never going to help land me a job, or assist with practical needs. Instead, masculine skills like competition, negotiation, and rational thinking took over, as I pushed this part of myself down.

In my twenties, I began to read about matriarchal civilizations of the past, their rituals and ways of life. There, female gifts like intuition were venerated, not feared, and people like me assumed positions of leadership as sages and healers. While it felt good knowing that I wasn't alone, I was still reluctant to let this side of my nature out.

I read all the books I could get my hands on, while learning how to direct energy. I let the drugs and alcohol go, and began to walk a little taller. Maybe I was never going to be like other people, but I was a person, and that counted. I began to give readings, a few at first, then more and more as word spread.

The first time I "came out" as a psychic, my knees were shaking. I'd met someone at a party and the words just blurted from my mouth. I half expected the person's face to fall, or for him to demand that I be removed. But to my surprise, he smiled and said, "How interesting."

I can't remember what else we talked about, but I can recall that powerful feeling of standing up for the gift I had done my best to disown. And every day that’s passed since then, when I can't imagine doing anything else for a living, I thank whatever female-loving power helped me say those words out loud.


pheebsabroad's picture

Well done you!

Kicking any addictive habit is difficult on it's own even without societal pressures such as being "different" or unique. I am glad to hear that you are standing up for yourself and speaking out about who you are.


SassyPsychic's picture


Hey Pheobe -

Thanks for your comment. It has been a journey, for sure, but a pretty rewarding one at that!


Myrthe's picture

Thank you for sharing your

Thank you for sharing your story, Ally. I know what it feels like to feel (be?) different and feel like you don't fit in. I am glad that you found the strength abandon the alcohol and the drugs and to be yourself and be proud of who you are.

SassyPsychic's picture

Who Knew?

Thanks, Myrthe! At the time, I thought I was in my own little bubble of suffering. But who knew that feeling different was about as universal a story as could be? :)

Myrthe's picture

Isn't it funny how, as we

Isn't it funny how, as we grow older, we come across so many people who for all kinds of different reasons felt like they didn't fit in?

SassyPsychic's picture

Soooooo true! And all along

Soooooo true! And all along we were thinking we were the only ones. Well, here's to recognizing that connection we all share.

ccontreras's picture

Amazing story!

I really enjoyed your story! I can relate to your story so much. I am not a psychic, though I wish I had your powers! I really do! But I was bullied for being different, but I have used my uniqueness to my advange. Kind of like what you have done. You are really a role model for other psychics out there that may be afraid of being misjudged! Best of luck!

"I embrace emerging experience. I am a butterfly. Not a butterfly collector." - Stafford

SassyPsychic's picture


Thanks so much for your comment. It took a while, but I finally realized that it might do some good to speak up for anyone who feels different, not just people who have intuitive abilities (actually, I believe everyone has those, to one degree or another). Bullying has been on my mind a lot lately, particularly because of the It Gets Better campaign. I'm so glad that exists, and hoping it helps kids, so they have to go through this. You're absolutely right -- uniqueness is a strength, not a weakness!

ola.mahadi's picture

thank you for sharing these

thank you for sharing these story glad that you had made such change in your life hopefully by sharing this you are helping other to achieve the same in their life
Stay well

It is never too late to try make your way to your dream and left up your expectation.
Sudanes Women Building Peace

SassyPsychic's picture

Thanks, Ola!

It has been a journey, to be sure, But I am drawn to people who feel different, and hop that together we can all make a better world. :)

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