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Let go of my hand!

I had read and listened to stories of how older men, mostly married harass young women and girls in my country. But I never imaged an old man, thirsty or more years than me sink so low as to want to have an affair with me.
The weather outside was cold, and windy, I had a plan laid down for the day and because a taxi seemed expensive to use, I would rather walk where am able le and get on a minibus where it was a bit far.
I wore my black jacket, a long skirt and covered shoes though not very warm, at least, I was kept from freezing.
Hiking cars is never on my agenda and I find it strange to ask for transport, not because of pride but because of the many mystery stories my friends tell. As I hurried on my way behind the civic center, a white van stopped besides me. “Hey, where you are going?” I heard a hoarse voice asking?” I turned my head to see who it was and in it was an old man about the age of my father. The respect I have for elderly people made me turn and answer the stranger’s questions. He seemed a matured respectable man; I never hesitated to accept the lift.
I felt relieved as my walk was shortened. I sat next to the old man in the front sit.But as he drove, one of his hands held mine and he started caressing it.
I couldn’t believe my eyes; I got so scared but had the strength to tell him to leave my right hand. He let go of my hand but as if this was not enough, he got hold of it again forcefully and this time telling me, soon I would enjoy this. I got furious and said NO! am not that kind of girl, let go of me, Deep inside I was dead scared, and when I looked outside the car to see where we were, It was not the direction I was heading to. As the car stopped on the roundabout, I tried to open it and get out but the door was locked. I told him to drop me off. He saw the fire in my eyes, I was so angry, he quickly made a turn and dropped me!
NO! is a powerful word and helped me from the unknown.

Comments

Nicqizi's picture

Let go of my hand . . .

My sister,
WOW! Abuse comes in so many forms and even from those who seem 'innocent'. I am very happy to hear that you escaped unhurt. Thanks be to God.
It is a pity you never managed to get his name so he knew you had the power to report him, even if nothing would have come from the report. In many instances the argument is that 'women' beg for abuse when we enter vehicles of strangers. Ugh. May this experience be a source of strength to others, even if they did not manage to escape. I feel for you.

Dando's picture

yes sis

abuse come in so many ways. And it is sad that most innocent women become victims of abuse. And I feel we should write, talk and continue raising our voices for ignorant women to be able to stand up for what is write and report such cases of abuse.Usually when we women enter such cars, we never realize that a person who seemed understanding and welcoming can turn against you and want something in return just because he has given you a lift oh No.

Anyways we thank God that we are learning alot from such sites as this and we are able to voice out and share with our fellow women.

Best and thanks

Sharese's picture

Strength

I am so glad that you are a strong woman and have the voice to say no. I have known so many girls that were not that empowered. Good for you for standing up for yourself. The entitlement that men seem to feel they have in almost every culture that I have participated in, is something that is appalling to me.

Thank you for sharing this story, Dando :)

In peace and love,

Sharese

Dando's picture

Sharese

its like some men come from the one family, but we thank God there are caring men out there.
It is by God's protection that we escape and network like worldpulse that we become self-empowered and able to stand up for what is right.
thanks for taking time to read through.
Best

zoneziwoh's picture

Wonderful, that was brave

You did it. What the hell was he thinking? I felt extremely furious the moment i read the line he said 'you will soon enjoy this' . This is unbelievable. In order words he thought you will joking over your response.

Good thing, you spoken in the language he understood and thus had no choice but to liberate you.

Thanks for sharing your story.

Stay Blessed

Zoneziwoh

Blog: http://zofem.blogspot.com/

facebook: Zoneziwoh

twitter: @ZoFem

Dando's picture

Thanks to God and women like you

who has taught me to stand up for myself.
we really need to speak out, as it is the only way to let these men know that we are humans and not objects NO!
thanks for your comment and God bless

sibusisiweyona's picture

wow

hey girl your story is awesome, it happens to a lot of women out there and some of them do not have the courage and the resolve that you displayed. that man should be ashamed of himself but you must also forgive him. he was wrong and he deserves many curses but standing up means being able to let go and allow God to rebuild you and restore you. i hope you have forgiven him

Sibusisiwe

Dando's picture

yap girl

I have already for given him. It is through forgiveness one finds courage and strength to move on.
Thanks for your comment. Lets continue praying for such men who take advantage of women in many situations.

God bless

Dando's picture

yap girl

I have already for given him. It is through forgiveness one finds courage and strength to move on.
Thanks for your comment. Lets continue praying for such men who take advantage of women in many situations.

God bless

Jan K Askin's picture

Strength in One Word

Dear Dando,

Your entry captured my attention to the end. I was hoping for a strong ending. May your first forceful "No" give you the strength to follow your sense of right from now on.

Thank you for inspiring strength in me and others,

Your sister,

Jan

Jan Askin

Dando's picture

Thanks Dear,

it will certainly do!
and thank you for reading through and leaving a comment.

With Love

Myrthe's picture

I am so glad that you found

I am so glad that you found the power within you to say no. Thank you for sharing your story. I think a lot of women will recognize the situation you were in.

Dando's picture

Myrthe!

great to hear from you.
Thanks for your comment. I love writing and sharing my experiance as I learn from others too. And this plateform has given us the chance to express our inner thoughts, and find solution for some of the challeges we go through.
we are indeed building each other here.

thanks and God bless

Frances Faulkner's picture

setting the standard

Dando,
While it is unfortunate you had to experience the old man's lust, you set a standard of "NO" that maybe will reverberate with him for awhile, making him less sure of himself in trying to abuse the next woman he picks up. You delivered it perfectly!

Frances

Dando's picture

thanks Frances

Hope this man learnt something from the whole thing. How I wish all men would perceive women as patners and noble human being who should be respected. This man is older enough and I wonder how he treats his wife if he can't respect women he meets on the way.
lets continue raising our voices till we help our male patners to accept us and treat us with respect and honour.

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