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A Curse

There is immeasurable gratitude in me towards God for giving me this life. I am content with all these he has blessed me. From the bottom of my heart, I am giving thanks to him for his kindness. Among all of his blessing a very special one is born as a girl whereas most of the people in my society think it’s a sin and they believe “if you are a girl through whole of your life you will have to endure the pain for this sin. Sometimes I panic but never give up my hope, my dream, and my desire. Nothing to do with girls child-people in my society thinks like that. As a result, no one expect to have girl child. While I was in 9th grade, one of my friend, shahana, got married with a man who around 20 years older than her. Thus, after marriage she had to relinquish her study as she moved to another place near to the capital city with her husband. After a few years, while reading a newspaper, I was so stunned that my eyes could not blink. My eyes were just immovable on page 8 at the bottom part of the news paper where it was written “suicide-betrayal of husband”. Shahana killed herself burning in to a fire. I could not believe and the reason behind this suicide was her husband who wanted to use his wife in his business as a product to impress his business partners.
I am fortunate that I am still studying, still I am dreaming, cherishing my hopes. Being a girl in my society still follow some prejudices. Interestingly, laughing out loud was restricted for girls. Whenever I laughed specially in the evening or morning time, my grandmother used to tell me that girls should not laugh in these times. So I grew up with some prejudices that made my life and my perceptions. I am fortunate that fortunately I moved to a city with my parents. If I were in village, it would not have been possible for me to study or express my story to the worldpulse community. I was thrilled as I heard from my mother that my aunt had to die since she gave birth to a female child. We are three sisters, no brother. Not having a brother considers as insecurity, impurity as well as being incriminated and inculpated. Indeed all of these beliefs are getting priority only because of the patriarchal social system in Bangladesh. I still remember the day as if t were yesterday, when we three sisters along with my mother were not allowed to sit in my uncle’s wedding as my grandmother believed that if we sit with him, he might only have girl child in the future. We were considered as inauspicious. My mother cried out, silently tears came up but never said anything to anyone. But I saw her tears that represented her agonizing feeling being ill-fated.
Now come to another point of education. It is not written anywhere that boys should get education rather than girls. However, in my society, if you are a boy, you are permitted to go to schools but if you are a girl, you are prohibited from going to schools. Most of my cousins got married. Those who have not, working in households, helping other women in cooking or rearing children. Once I asked my aunt why do not they send their daughters to school. What she said it does not make any sense to me as she said “its too far for girls. What they will do going to schools, it is better to stay home and learning household chores”. My question was that if boys can go to schools why not girls? However, my question remained unanswered.
My question is that why girls are only the victim? Though they have born with the same physical compatibility and intelligence like me, there was immense curiosity within me to know what is unknown to me. Women seem to be seeking strength, freedom but they are afraid to raise their voice against injustice and inequality. As result, their silence can lead their lives in to termination.
It does not matter whether you are a boy or girl, I does not matter whether you are rich or poor. But it does matter that you are human who have full rights to say something against injustices and inequalities.

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Breese's picture

Thank you

Dear Arpita - you have bravely shared your voice, and shed light on some frightening and sad realities in your society. Have you seen much work being done to empower women and change some of the stigmas you mentioned here? Again, thank you for sharing your voice and your story with us.

Nusrat Ara's picture

Never stop believing in

Never stop believing in yourself and of course have faith in women power always.

Nusrat

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