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Unchained Miracle

by angelique gatsinzi | February 22, 2011 at 4:04 AM

angelique gatsinzi

Maziyateke

Tags:

mystory2011

peace begins with a smile

The same way a minister cannot conduct a wedding without a groom is the same way I cannot speak about miracles without acknowledging God.

In my twenty four years the grim reaper has silently knocked on my door twice. His black wool cloak flapping against the strong winds, inside his skeletal frame creaking like the familiar sound of grandma’s kitchen door that needs oiling and in his bony hand the sharp blade of his scythe glistening in the moonlight.

‘Tap Tap Tap!’

The sound constantly rings in my head and I cower behind a veil of uncertainty, ‘Lord, has my time come?’ I ask. I am wakened by the sound of Mozart’s Eich Kleine Nachtmusik playing on the national radio, how could music so sweet be played in between bouts of cold-blooded hatred?

At the age of eight one of the bloodiest genocides of the twentieth century ripped fiercely through Rwanda, and all I had as a reminder of the good life was my beloved plastic doll, Tinnie. The angry slash on her stomach created by my brother who wanted to understand why she peed when we gave her water mirrored the fear that gripped mine. Why was my life spared when around me almost a million people were butchered like fattened goats on Christmas Day?

A few months later the Lake Tanganyika threatened to swallow me whole as I vehemently tried to prove to myself and to my sisters that I could swim. I fought her so hard her wave pushed me back to the shore. I won both times but those are not my miracles.

My miracle today is that even after going through those terrifying experiences, I can look upon life with rose-tinted glasses. The upheavals that were my life after the genocide are what make my life beautiful: I can still see riches where there is poverty, good in an evil world, joy through tears, a family in a broken down society, selfless acts in a selfish world but most importantly I can see God in a faithless world.

Miracles should not just be seen as moments in life that go beyond our human comprehension; just because you have not seen it before, do not know the answer or do not have the formula, does not mean it is out of this world.

And so I live my life in the comfort of God’s presence.

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Comments

Wow. I do affirm that I am waiting for your autobiography my dear. Your intro was just amazing. You are a mircale and indeed, God has worked a great miracle through you to bring you to today.

from today i live out of my imagination
i am more than my yesterday
tomorrow i plant a new seed
nothing that lies behind easy
nothing that is ahead real
my within is all i have today
*Napo Masheane*

that will be the title of the chapter I dedicate to you .... lol
and thank you so much soul sister, my writing skills get better everyday with your help and guidance and I am very grateful indeed to have you as a mentor! and indeed God has played a part in our lives and the miracles are just the beginning an ounce of all the things He can do for us!

Thanxxx

Angélique

'I dream of an Africa which is in peace with itself'
- Nelson Mandela -

Ah, I will miss these days coming so quickly to an end :(

But yes, oh yes, this is all God. We are each activating something within each other that needs to wake up and say "I am HERE!" Thank you for your kind words. Any small bit I can play is great great great!

Keep writing because your voice is magic. I love what you write so much because it comes from that place in you that's true.

Go forth and conquer mademoiselle!

from today i live out of my imagination
i am more than my yesterday
tomorrow i plant a new seed
nothing that lies behind easy
nothing that is ahead real
my within is all i have today
*Napo Masheane*

A good one. Keep writing.

Love

Nusrat

With these encouraging words, I will endeavour to continue.

Angélique

'I dream of an Africa which is in peace with itself'
- Nelson Mandela -

Though your whole piece is powerful and soul-ful, the beginning with the extended description of death as the grim reaper was extremely well done.

Is this indeed an introduction to your book? Hope so, because this reader wants to learn more about the upheavals that made your life beautiful and your perspective optimistic.

Thank you for sharing,

Anna

Speaking my Peace

Hi Angelique! I have read about the Rwanda genocide many many times ... including accounts of how people suffered and died, and how victims survived. Miracles do happen at all times, big and small, unrecognized or celebrated. You're one of the very amazing ones who have lived their miracles, not only at the moment, but for always and for others. Just reading your piece now I feel I am part of your miracle ... simply because I am your sister! Way to go for all of us ... all the best...

Always,
Emie Zozbrado

Dear love,

You are such an amazing woman. You know what, you are a powerful woman.This is more like a woman who sleeps without food.Such people can tell tales of lif and they can always endure to the end.Just like a house built upon the rock, it cant easily fall and that one built on the sand its fall will be great.So i take it that you are so rigid, so tough ,nothing cant easily befall you and get away with you.Indeed you have seen a lot my dear.May God keep you to see all your generations like Nelson Mandela.

God bless your heart.Thanks for sharing.

Warona

"success will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time " And when confronted conquer with love

Thank you so much for your beautiful words of encouragement, in this world women endure many struggles and without my mother's strength and God's omnipresence I would not be the woman I am today. And I am honoured to be in a place where I can share my experiences and even touch the light of a woman that is losing its brightness.

I have been toying with the idea of writing an autobiography, talking about life after the genocide, because so far most of the books written concentrate a lot on the actual bloody event. I find that the journey people went through after they stepped out of the country is just as significant and powerful, there are so many stories I occasionally reminisce with my family and we laugh and laugh, often forgetting that when it was happening we were crying, wondering if we would ever get out. Since I did not spend too long in the country, I cannot speak much about the actual event but definitely, with more practice I will surely have a chapter or two by the end of this year. But I promised myself that for my 30th birthday I will have a book with my name on it! And you ladies will be most welcomed to attend the book launch =D

Thank you so much

Loads of love,

Angélique

'I dream of an Africa which is in peace with itself'
- Nelson Mandela -

Angelique, I absolutely adore this! Your writing is so incredibly powerful and descriptive and your conclusion brought a smile to my face. Your miracle is beautiful. You are beautiful. I would love to read your autobiography and strongly encourage you to keep writing and share your extraordinary story and talent with the world!

=D ... how wonderful you are for your kind words, I will strive to continue - so long as the stories remain in my heart I will continue to share them with you all.

Angélique

'I dream of an Africa which is in peace with itself'
- Nelson Mandela -

I echo the WOW put out by all these other readers! You do not just tell us a story, you weave one. Whether you turn your words into books, or keep writing these short and provocative pieces, we are so thankful to read and learn from your strength!

Rose-colored glasses are miraculous, and so very stylish:)

all the best,

Kati

*resolved this year to think twice and to smile twice before doing anything*

This has been an interesting and inspiring read. It's quite humbling for you to have identified your miracles as not the near death experiences but the life you've lived afterwards.

This forces me to reflect not on the single events in my life that may have created 'goose pimples' but on the cumulation of gracious experiences I have had that make me what I am today... thanks for helping me realise my life is the miracle not the things I have or have achieved!

Looking forward to reading from u soon.

Tayo

Your writing is so very inspiring and beautiful as you are! You clearly have learned to savor the best in life and be able to tell the deeper story that beholds this best! You are a powerful woman and a powerful writer. I wish you the very best in the future and keep writing...the world needs to hear your story! Blessings, Elaine

Elaine R. Millam

Thank you, I always say that with God lighting my path - my future will always be bright. I am thankful for my memories, and I am thankful for my parents - who made sure I was clothed, fed and sheltered even if they went to bed hungry a few times. The world will definitely hear my story because I risk shutting down because of overload if I don't release some of it (LOL) .... but thank you so much Elaine!

Angélique

'I dream of an Africa which is in peace with itself'
- Nelson Mandela -

I really enjoyed this post, though I think that the world is not as selfish or faithless as you have said. The events and people who seem to display these negative aspects are merely lessons for us to learn from.

Keep writing! What a beautiful story.

-Sarah

Sarah Freeman-Woolpert
The George Washington University
U.S. Ambassador, The Early Childhood Development Center
Kathmandu, Nepal

"Peace begins with a smile" Is what caught my eyes. I had to read through and I am so glad to have come across your story. I am really touched by your story.

Keep writing and will read more in time... now I have a plane to catch :-)

All the best.
Amei

Dear Angelique -
I wanted to congratulate you personally for the selection of your story to be published in World Pulse Magazine.
You are a very, very talented writer. I want to encourage you earnestly to continue your writing practice and to pursue your dream of a book. You have a very important story to tell. I was just in your beautiful country and I was meeting with Shirley Randell of the Rwanda Women's University Association which is building a network of women leaders across the nation and east africa. She was just speaking out loud her dream of having more women writers and literary voices emerge from Rwanda. I will tell her about you, because I think you are one of those jewels.

Let me know how I can be of assistance to you as you pursue your dream.

With great respect and admiration,
Jensine
Founder, World Pulse

Jensine Larsen
World Pulse

Jensine, Once the madness that is academia ends in the next few months, I will definitely have to start thinking deeply about where I want this writing to take me. I am grateful for the help that you are offering and I will definitely be needing it - thank you.

Sarah, I know that the world is not as faithless and selfish as I say it is and I haven't seen the whole world but when I continue to see millions of people suffer without that much reason, I cannot help but make such conclusions. But among us there are some strong people who have that love without boundaries that can at least try to turn those things around.

Enjoy your plane journey, Amei

*Smiles*

Angélique

'I dream of an Africa which is in peace with itself'
- Nelson Mandela -

i have only just joined the network and i read your story it was so touching i even cried so much because i went through something similar. you really made me see you in that story i am happy that its a season that has passed and you have survived it. your story is such an encouragement for so many people out there keep writing and thank you for sharing

warm regards

Sibusisiwe