Who am I????????
21st century is similar to a dodgy competition among humans. Each person is making an effort to be successful in the race. They have no time for themselves. I am also a part of this demanding competition and trying my best to win the race. I never think about who I am or what is my identity. In fact, I have many identities i.e. being a Muslim, being a Pakistani, being a daughter, being a woman, but I am never able enough to distinguish that what is my authentic identity.
For a moment, I assume that being Muslim is my identity because I strongly belief in Islam and its practices. I belief in this religion not because I inherited it from ancestors, but because I believe that Islam is the most persuasive and verified religion in this world. I am significantly influenced by what Islam teaches me. For instance, Islam gives equal right to everyone therefore I have no right to categorize anyone on the basis of their caste or any other worldly rank. These teachings of Islam manipulate my thoughts, ideas and beliefs.
Another moment, I consider that I am Pakistani. I am Pakistani because Pakistan is my mother land. I am Pakistani because I was born in Pakistan. I am Pakistani because my native language is Urdu. I am Pakistani because I wear shalwar kameez, which is national dress for women in Pakistan. I am Pakistani because I belief on Quaid-e-Azam’s (founder of Pakistani) motto, “Unity, Faith and Discipline.” I am Pakistani because I celebrate all events which are identity of Pakistan. All these facts verify me that I am Pakistani.
For a moment or two, I feel that being a daughter is my identity. Relationship between daughter and parent is exceptionally unique. The relationship between me and my parents is similar to the golden sun and the blue sky…always together. I am always cherished by my parents for the most part in my life. I got the equal priority as my brothers do. My parents always support in every failure. As a result of this delicate and loving relationship between me and my parents, I am proud to identify myself as daughter.
For a while, I experience that being jutt (one type of caste in Pakistan) is my identity nevertheless I never desired to identify myself as jutt. The main reason for not desiring is that I don’t want to create inequality between me and my friends who belongs to low caste. In my view point, each and every one is my friend whether from inferior caste or superior caste. I can even marry with lower caste person because caste does not make us content or successful. I can’t predict that someone belongs to upper caste family will be absolutely happy or successful. For me, Persona never depends on the caste or other social discriminations. It is just the system of domination of one group of people over another. As a result of this reaction towards caste, I never wanted to introduce myself by caste. But still people from my culture wanted to highlight my caste in any get-together.
In conclusion, all these are my identities. I am Muslim, Pakistani, and Jutt daughter. But I have my uniqueness and my personality and I want everyone to be familiar with that uniqueness. Even though, my surrounding tends me to understand my identity, yet I want to be what I am, not what my identity made me. A singer: Jessica Andrews put my feelings about identity in plain words in her one song “who I am” Here are few lines:
So when I make the big mistake
When I fall flat on my face
I know I’ll be alright
Should my tender heart be broken
I will cry those tear drops knowin’
I will be just fine
‘Cause nothin’ changes who I am
My momma’s still my biggest fan
Sometimes I’m clueless and I’m clumsy
But I’ve got friends who love me
And they know where I stand
It’s all a part of me
And that’s who I am
That’s who I am