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Finding myself through your voices

For the past two years when I was asked to introduce myself I’d go for the things I wish I could change in our communities like peace, community development and education for all, not who and what I am because there was this continuous inner voice saying, say your name is Rudzanimbilu and you never finish what you started. There are three things that led me to World Pulse, my passion for peace studies, and being a single parent in a community that believes a family is when a man is the head of the house and my failure to run a non profit organization which I started when I was fourteen until 2008. The centre was instrumental in tackling the scourge of illiteracy, poverty and teenage pregnancy using the arts as a solution.

I blamed myself for everything until one morning, a male colleague, younger than I am said women are not suppose to be running this kind of things. It was a wake up call; did I fail because I was a woman? Where were women out there, who have shown the world that women can be leaders too? In a step by step manner I wanted to understand what other women were going through all over the world and I got tired of reading about what the United Nations is doing in developing countries to alleviate poverty. There was an overabundance of works, websites & statistics from both national and international NGO’s seeking to find solutions to women’s challenges but women still remained as sidelines to their voices. And in April this year while I was on a Google spree I found voices of women, screaming out loud for change and most of all taking action.

When an opportunity to apply for the Voices of Our Future came, I was still silent, too embarrassed by my own failure to share because that inner voice kept on saying, you won’t finish, they will see right through you and you won’t be chosen as one of the 30 trainee correspondents. Today as I write, I realize that it doesn’t matter if I’m chosen because I have learned so much, I have a long way to go and this is an opportunity to redirect my focus and do what I’ve always loved to do, to represent them.

I would like to run a free career information and training hub for learners in high schools so that I can contribute in changing the lives of our township communities by giving them access to information and opportunities that pass by everyday because they have no access to the internet and resources to sustain their livelihood. Without the VOF training, support and networking that I have received so far, chances are this vision will remain only in my dreams forever.

I am proud to say my name is Rudzanimbilu and I am learning to finish what I have started and like the SOUL OF WORLD PULSE, I’m empowered so greatly, I AM UNSTOPPABLE.

Comments

Eliana's picture

Thank you Rudzanimbilu, I

Thank you Rudzanimbilu,
I could step into your situation because a couple of years ago, I still felt not at ease being a single mother in our little village where the aim is having a family composed by mother, father and children. I chose to take this path because I thought there is no need to keep up an appearence of "happy family" only for society when I know that this is not the truth. I am happy and proud for the decision I took and I would surely do it again.
I tended as well to see the fault and the guilt in myself and in my inabilities but with the time and work on myself as a woman and person I discovered that there are many good and valuable sides about myself as a person and woman and that I have many talents. It was not easy way to get to this point and still sometimes I fall back into this old scheme of thinking but now it is easier to raise again and to put the focus on the GOOD THINGS and QUALITIES that lie in me. And on every thing I achieved.
And as I read through your journal I discovered what a strong and wonderful woman you are to fight for your rights and to raise a child as a single mother!

Be proud of yourself! You tried to run an NGO, you raise your child alone, you speak for yourself. YOU ARE ACTIVE!

See yourself through your eyes and leave those behind who blame you or make you feel sad or inadequate. You are much better than you think.

Thank you! Keep on fighting and lifting your voice
Peace to you
Eliana

Eliana

Rudzanimbilu's picture

Thank you Eliana

I will gather the strength and be proud of what I am and I will learn to see myself through my own eyes. Thank you so much for your astute observation and your encouraging words. I am learning to see myself through women like you, who, despite all the hurdles have managed to stay strong and find it within you to encourage others to be strong. I feel so privileged to be one of the World Pulse members because of people like you.

I will keep on fighting, yes, I will.

Thank you

Rudzanimbilu Muthambi

You are wonderful. I totally agree with Eliana be proud of yourself.

You really have done much more that I have dared to. Your dream is more clear. You inspire me across the oceans. I am so glad I met you.

You have made me think more clearly. Yes, Worldpulse give us strength. I was thinking along your lines to somehow assist the peopel who cannot reach worldpulse due to lack of access to internet and capacity to communicate in a common language.

You are a beautiful person in my circle of friends.

With love
Amei

Rudzanimbilu's picture

Thank you Amei

Your words have given me strength and reassurance that things will be alright. We all inspire each other here.

Thank you so much.

Take care of yourself.

Rudzanimbilu Muthambi

Sarah Diop's picture

You are an Incredible women

Rudzanimbilu,

Thank you for sharing. Your concern and passion for women is very clear. You should be proud of yourself for all you have accomplished as a single mother, as a philanthropist (at the young age of 14), as a strong women writer. You may be worried about not finishing, but you have and it was incredible. Please keep writing, believing in yourself and speaking for those you don't have a voice.

I just closed a social business that I started 4 years ago, this July. I've had many wise women and men tell me that the only true way to succeed is learning through failure. Closing your not for profit wasn't a failure, it gave you the opportunity to seek something else that would reach the same goal or lead to an opportunity for another goal, such as writing. I can see through your story that you are a strong, kind and honest person and I hope to read more of what you have to say!

Wishing you many Blessings,

Sarah

Rudzanimbilu's picture

Hello Sarah

As I was reading your what you wrote Sarah, I could feel the warmth of your words sinking in, in my brains and since I experienced the same fate, the pain just came rushing through but as I continue reading I saw and felt the other truth which I denied myself over the past two years. To acknowledge the fact that it is indeed true...to succeed is learning through failure. I love being a voice for my community and I love writing about our social issues as women and community members and sharing it makes so much difference. Thank you for your motivating, encouraging and empathetic words.

Rudzanimbilu Muthambi

Rebecca Roberts's picture

Thank you so much for sharing

Thank you so much for sharing your inspiring story! Your enthusiasm is contagious. Sometimes it takes a spark of misogyny to light our fire of righteous outrage. I'm glad you've come out fighting ~ in a positive way, of course. Your proposal for a career/training center in the schools is fabulous, and I'd love to hear more about that. Keep telling your stories and sharing your experiences with your World Pulse sisters!

Rudzanimbilu's picture

thank you so much Rebecca.

Thank you so much for reading. I will keep you posted regarding the career information and training hub, it is not going to be in schools but it is meant for the school going children, the youth in our community and the adults all young girls and women. They need to know about the opportunities and a wonderful world they can create if they are given an opportunity. You are welcome to assist with any ideas as I am busy trying to get a group of women so we can form an organization. We are working or registering it now and I hope by the end of this month we will have the constitution that we are all happy with.

Rudzanimbilu Muthambi

jenchapin's picture

Amazing post!

Thank you so much for taking the careful time and consideration to share your personal struggles with us. While I know that often people only like to hear of success, I believe truly that it is often the failures, the mistakes and the missteps that make us learn and that give us the determination and the knowledge to move on and up. I truly believe that you have the heart and the determination to make your dreams come true! Best of luck with everything, and I look forward to reading more!

Rudzanimbilu's picture

Thank you Jen

Please accept my apology...I was reading today and I realised I didn't reply. It was not intentional. I appreciate your wishes, your words of encouragement and I know deep inside it is all meaningful. Thank you so much Jen.

Rudzanimbilu Muthambi

Sara_Aissa's picture

"You have been told that,

"You have been told that, even like a chain, you are as weak as your weakest link.
This is but half the truth. You are also as strong as your strongest link.
To measure you by your smallest deed is to reckon the power of ocean by the frailty of its foam.
To judge you by your failures is to cast blame upon the seasons for their inconsistency."

-Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet

Thank you for your powerful words, keep them coming!

Sara_Aissa

Rudzanimbilu's picture

Thank you so much for sharing Sara

Those words are uplifting and inspiring. Thank you.

Rudzanimbilu Muthambi

Emie Zozobrado's picture

Wow!

Hi sister! Whew ... you have such a tongue-twister of a name! But, of course, when we speak together in one voice, we don't twist our tongues because we speak just one language - the language of womanhood! And whoever says failure is always negative?!!!! Sister, it's not wrong to fail and it's not bad to fall! We learn our lessons - not only for ourselves, but we pave the way for others, too! Experience is the best teacher, right? Thomas Edison, after failing 99 times, shrugged it off and said "At least I know now that 99 ways don't work!" You see, some missions are done through relay ... someone's role is to pick it up right where we have dropped it.... that's destiny .... and destiny brought us here, together! And wow, you're a real great woman!

Always,
Emie Zozobrado

Rudzanimbilu's picture

Thank you Emie

You are a wonderful, brilliant and an amazing woman. I am so glad that we found each other here. Each story you write gives me a new insight and so much strength and hope. I am really grateful for that. You talk of destiny and now I know why I have to go through it all and now I've found women who can offer the support, the courage and a will for one to take a bold step one more time. Please, keep on writing because we are reading every single time we log in. Thank you, thank you so much. PS. I hope you will get my name right one day...hahaha

Rudzanimbilu Muthambi

Emie Zozobrado's picture

My pleasure!

Hi Rudzanimbilu! Oh my nose ... it's just like I'm reading one of those well-loved fairytale of all time ... Rum-pel-stilt-skin!!!! We are all grateful that we are here! It's true and it's amazing ... each story we read here we live it like our own. We are one .. always were and always will be. If there is one creation God entrusted peace, love, inspiration, faith and beauty with ... that is US - WOMEN. We have them all and we hold on to each other because it's the perfection of God's plan for us! Like the smart queen, we will beat all the Rumpelstiltskins in this world because we have woven our faith and conviction in such awe-inspiring power and nothing can stop us now....

Always,
Emie Zozobrado

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