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Introducing myself and my journal: Looking for a Place to Escape

About Me:
I am 39 years old. I am not working , have not been for almost 3 years. I have moved 3 times in the last month & looking for a place to escape to again. I am staying with family whom I have tried to avoid. As I type that I could hear my uncle saying ,'she expects me to ruin my own career by helping her' & my aunt yelling at me as soon as she opened the door to her home saying , 'You are causing me to lose friends.'
You see, here in the Bahamas - friends are everything. It is how you stay in business. People put out bids , let's say, but the person who gives the right quote has a friend in the office to let them know what the lowest bid was. Bahamians bypass all official procedures by making a friend in the office with a chicken snack. Long lines are avoided with a tip to a cousin. Favor returns favors. Pastors know everybody.
I went to a church called Bahamas Faith Ministries where Dr. Myles Munroe is the pastor. I was very young & just out of Miami, where I went to school up to the 7th grade. I was naive about the culture here. I was surprised at the amount of insulting treatment people just swallowed. I was used to the scenes on US news of people protesting , demanding justice in the courts & always there were 'supporters' around them. I am no longer in America.
I saw things in this church I loved & was expected to be quiet & even accommodating by covering up. It was against my morals. I was warned by family not to upset people. I thought they were backward people. I told married men I was not going to sleep with them. They made my work harder on the job. I started working for the church & thought I was in heaven. I was soon disappointed. I took everything as a good soldier.
Then some young school girls came in our department during the summer. The marred men treated them the same way. I became very upset & started protesting to my immediate supervisor & others. I found myself out of favor with all the pastors. They started in earnest - calling me a lesbian. Of course ,we had homosexuals in the church, no one was bothering them. No one talked to me. The pastors laughed at me & my family stopped associating with me.
I was in a white room. I felt nothing but pain. I tried to commit suicide the night I left work ( a family business, I left BFM) where I was being bullied just the same & when I went up for prayers I was slapped by the speaker. The men who became my enemies were laughing with tears pouring down their eyes.
I decided to cut my losses & go on with my life. After coming out of the hospital - I was sent a letter saying I would no longer be considered a member & I had to find another place to be buried. Members were buried for free ,sort of, you paid years of tithes & offering. I was left alone for 2 years.
I tried to join another church. My first meeting back in a church was recorded & many people told me they saw me on television when I returned to work. I was doing security, another job. The lady pastor who slapped me raced down the sidewalk to meet me & ask me where exactly I used to be posted. I told her & the same bullying started in earnest on every post they put me on. The same tactics started being used , everyone began complaining about me -where once I was always called the best worker - I was now causing trouble.
I began going downtown to ask for alms to get something to eat. Fifteen police officers surrounded me & one threatened to shoot me. I have been harassed by the police constantly. They tell people not to help me because I am a con artist. I do not want to work. I was called a prostitute when I called the police after being assaulted whiles being homeless.
I am in a very precarious situation. I never know what is going to happen , if I find a place to stay - how long will I be there. I am treated like a criminal every day.

My Passions:
bible, justice, reading, music, kids

My Challenges:
everything is a challenge

My Vision for the Future:
To be out of the Bahamas

My Areas of Expertise:
I am a good supervisor & bible teacher


Sarvina's picture

Welcome to PulseWire!

Hi there,

I’m so glad and excited to see you in our community! Thanks so much for joining us, you are always free to post to your journal and add comments to others posts too, this is where we can freely contribute for the betterment of women and children all over that world. Please feel free to browse through our group section and post to the groups you decided to join.....On worldpulse everything is free...just be yourself.

Welcome again to our PulseWire Community and I look forward to seeing you more in here!!!

Warm Regards,


Sarvina from Cambodia
VOF 2011 Correspondent

Fatima Waziri's picture

Hey there! Welcome to

Hey there! Welcome to PulseWire!

It’s so exciting having you with us, I am sure you will have a fabulous time with your new online friends as well as find this to be a very positive experience. I encourage you to take advantage of the numerous resources and features available through our vibrant online community.
Welcome again to our global community and I look forward to hearing more from you here on PulseWire!


L F Obbrace's picture

Spiritual Abuse & Bishop Eddie Long

Bishop Eddie Long , yet another story of spiritual abuse!! I am not surprised I thought he was gay. We have a Bishop here who is very close with him. They are all corrupt. A pastor is associated by most members as the voice of God. Most will defend him & as it sinks in they will leave. They will look for a place of safety & then probably leave the faith or denomination.
I have met so many from my former church who are discouraged about faith in God because they do not understand that what they are seeing every Sunday is not the image that Jesus showed as a living example nor is the messages of personal abundance here on earth a part of the gospel that tells us we will suffer here, therefore, we have to support one another. The bible predicts, unlike other religious books, their will be false leaders who use the flock for their own financial gain & for their own personal pleasure. Yet, people buy into the message that if they give to this minister they will get double or 7 times back what they gave.

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