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GBV in Italy

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During the last month 6 Italian women died: they were killed by their ex-boyfriends because they had the strenght to stop a relationship made of jealousy, violence and personal limitations. These women decided that it was time to wake up and to end up a relationship that was no longer love but only possessive. They had the courage to act and react but what for?
Their lives found a drammatical ending and in most of the cases even for the families left behind there is no justice, because the perpetrators of these deeds killed themselves.

Most of these women, after ending up their relationships, became victims of stalking and went to the police because they did not feel safe. Unfortunately, stalking is a growing phenomenon that is up to now not properly considered and punished. In some rare cases, women and men, too, find justice but they don't know for how long their peaceful living will last. And this uncertainty is limitating in every-day-life and blocks personal development.

I think, even stalking should be seen as a form of violence many women are subject to. And the victims are by far more than we can imagine. It is a psychological form of violence that can degenerate in physical violence. And it is subtle and latent. This is maybe why, in global and international agendas the problem is not very present.
Physical violence in all its aspects and facets (and there are too many still existing all around the world) is more visible because it leaves signs but psychological violence and pressure is invisible and creates a lot of harm. It diminuishes the self esteem and self-consciousness of a woman. And no one talks about it or considers stalking as it is: violence that generates even more violence.

In the campaigns against violence in every form and everywhere men should be included, too. It should be worked with them to understand the causes of their violence and give them different approach to their violence: transformation of the negative energy of violence into something positive and productive.

Thanks to everybody who shared her/his ideas on the blog

Sincerely
Eliana

Comments

jadefrank's picture

ending violence against women

Dear Eliana,

Thank you for sharing the recent tragedies in Italy and for bringing up the issue of stalking as a form of violence. Treating a woman as a possession rather than a relationship, is a form of violence that can lead to more serious forms of physical and metal violence when it's allowed to develop in this way.

Your idea - to work with women to approach violence against women as channeling negative energy into creative and productive outlets - is an excellent concept and I would love to hear more specifically how this could work on a community-wide level.

In friendship,
Jade

brianna.warren's picture

Psychological trauma

I agree with you - even if no physical signs are present, women could still be the victims of debilitating psychological violence. I often wonder why we aren't more attentive to the subtleties of psychological violence, including stalking. The end result is the same - it causes a woman to live in fear, and it damages the psyche. I would like to hear more about how you feel women could be counseled to cope with the psychological effects of stalking.

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