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Introducing myself and my journal: My search for me

About Me:
Hi Everyone, I'm Toyin and I'm 32 years old. I live in Ipswich with my partner of 13 years. I was born in Leicestershire, My Mother is English and my Father is Nigerian. I moved to Ipswich to study where I gained a Business Management degree, and I now work for the Civil Service. I would descibe myself as interesting, curious, funny, slightly odd and an all round decent person...I hope ...most of the time.

I realised something today that I spend alot of time seeking validation from others but find it difiicult to validate myself. I was heading into work thinking of the things I wish i could change or the things I wish I had done/hadn't done. I started thinking about what I had done in my life, not what I wish I had done, but what made me the person I am today, what lessons did I learn, what was painful and joyful. By the time I had arrived at work, a clear message came to me. How can I not validate myself? How can I stand here and not feel validated in my life and my history? I found it to be the single most powerful thought I'd had for quite a while. I'm learning to love myself and to respect where I've been, I've spent alot of time beating myself for not conforming to so many things a 32 year old woman should conform to, I'm not married, I don't have children yet, I don't own a house, I don't drive BUT I am .....everything else.

Comments

Toyin's picture

Validation

I realised something today that I spend alot of time seeking validation from others but find it difiicult to validate myself. I was heading into work thinking of the things I wish i could change or the things I wish I had done/hadn't done. I started thinking about what I had done in my life, not what I wish I had done, but what made me the person I am today, what lessons did I learn, what was painful and joyful. By the time I had arrived at work, a clear message came to me. How can I not validate myself? How can I stand here and not feel validated in my life and my history? I found it to be the single most powerful thought I'd had for quite a while. I'm learning to love myself and to respect where I've been, I've spent alot of time beating myself for not conforming to so many things a 32 year old woman should conform to, I'm not married, I don't have children yet, I don't own a house, I don't drive BUT I am .....everything else.

lynnemhealy's picture

Go Toyin Go!!!

How brilliant that you are realising just how amazing you are :-) Loving yourself and honouring your uniqueness is the greatest gift you can give yourself and the world. When enough people on the planet understand this there won't be the terrible abuse and violations going on everywhere ....

From one new member to another ... welcome!

Lynne

Lynne Healy
www.lynnehealy.co.uk

pooza11's picture

welcome sorry to greet u a

welcome
sorry to greet u a little late

nyways
welcome ! and have fun!

SunFish's picture

Hello

Toyin,

Self-Reflection can birth new growth and insight into old memories! I bet you'll be amazed at what you'll learn.

Look for the message in the mess!

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