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Happy Fathers' Day

Today is fathers' day, and yet another man has denied being father to his unborn child. The girl is 16 years old and in Senior High School. And she has been impregnated by her school teacher! Not long before this story broke, a well-known Headmaster impregnated a 16-year-old student of his school; to make amends for his misdeeds, he married the girl. It makes me ask myself whether my 15-year-old niece who is now in Senior High (boarding) School is safe at all.

We have so many single mothers, some still pregnant, who wonder why the man who "made love to her" denied making her pregnant. Several children including some adults do not know who their fathers are. Some know their fathers but only recognize them as the punisher. The father is gone for much of the day, making money; meanwhile, Mummy is there to feed, protect, kiss, wash and love the children. I suppose fatherhood means a lot more than being the one that makes money and exacts punishment.

I grew up not wanting to see my dad at all - he brought so much fear into me. But we lived in the same house and I could not avoid seeing him. In my adult life, I have decided to forget about the past, and love him as he is. In his old age, he is really nice to me. I observe some of his regrets that he never admits, but I am glad that at least he took care of ny siblings and I, and did not deny being our father. I also watch my cousin whose wife has deserted him and their four children - he is both father and mother to the children. I admire my colleague whose wife I do not know, and who baths, feeds, massages, reads to and chats with his children daily. I admire my priest who loves several people as his children even though some of these "children" are older than himself.

To the men who impregnate women and dump them, I say "You shall live to regret your actions". To those who impregnate children, I say, "May the law catch you and put you away". And to all good fathers, I say Happy Fathers' Day and God bless you.


Carri Pence's picture

It is sad that men don't have

It is sad that men don't have the paternal instinct that mothers do. It seems far easier for fathers to neglect their children than that of mothers. It is more culturally acceptable for men to not see their family and deny their duty of raising their own children. Furthermore, it is hard because men are defined by society as the bread winners but women have the roles of being the caretaker and financially supporting her family. Thus, there needs to be a reshaping and restructuring of our community and traditions in redefining a males role in the family. Once this is changed I believe that fathers 'paternal instinct' will kick in and they will start becoming more available to their family.

Patti's picture

Can we all lend a hand to

Can we all lend a hand to change the perception that society holds about men not being the caretakers of children? I always say a woman becomes pregnant by sexually engaging with a man, not by drinking a cup of cold water. If men contribute to bring children into the world, they must also care for them.

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