Community Update

Digital Empowerment Toolkit Now Available!

At World Pulse, we recognize the need for ongoing learning—for you and for your community! Our toolkits aim to provide the resources you need to advance your social change work.

We are excited to introduce our Digital Empowerment Trainers’ Toolkit, a dynamic resource to help you bring the benefits of connecting online to women in your community. Check it out today! »

Tears in heaven... Smiles in hell

Do you know what living in a world, where you’re always being told what to do, means? To have a family, where nobody cares about you?

I thought I had one. Here’s my story…

1992. I was 18 years old. To me, life had stopped. I wanted to do something that would change everything. But I did not have the chance.

There was a crisis.
And our family, was now poorer than ever…

My mother lost her job in December. We could barely survive with my dad’s salary. This winter was the worst thing to ever happen to me. The food we ate, the bed I slept in... Everything was cold. One day my dad came home saying he lost a huge amount on poker. Our last money.

I began hating my parents, thinking they did not know how to look after their family. I started falling out with them and always found a reason to bang the door. One day we just stopped talking to each other – like enemies…

I thought it could not get any worse. I was wrong.

A month later I got sick and one gloomy day I just fell asleep…

I did not know what had happened to me and my parents – one day, as I woke up, I found myself lying in that bed – everything was white and the silence could kill me… For just a blink of an eye I said to myself, I was dead and everything was OK – I was in heaven… I closed my eyes. Then heard a cry. That was not heaven, but a hospital. My mother was there, staring worried at me. I smiled to her – she was so beautiful…

I asked her how long I had been asleep and her answer shocked me. Five months had past. She was crying, explaining how sorry she was, accusing herself…

* * *

Now I believe this “dream” changed my life. It showed how I should behave towards the people I love.

Now my parents mean everything to me. And my kids – they would say their grandparents rock!

I didn’t know love really existed until I felt it.
I didn’t know poverty, misery and pain until I crashed into them.
I didn’t know anything… but I do know.

P.S.: It's not a real story.... I just felt like writing something like that


pooza11's picture

heartly written


you have written in a very inspiring way. Whie reading the few sentences, i though you really hate your parents and will never forgive them But it was nice to hear the twist.I am happy to hear how the dream changed your entire life and you understood the meaning of life.
I am thrilled to know that your parents mean evrything to you. We all should keep one thing in mind that no matter what, no matter they scold us, they does it for our beneficial. This is the tendency of children to feel in such a way.
Your parents really rock ! Do write more

Love You

I'm glad you like it!!!
I rarely write about such things, but that day it just happened... :)

Oh! wow! you got me there for a minute! thank God it is fiction. You write very well. Thank you for sharing.


Katie McDonald's picture

Good message

Hi Bilyana,

I think your story has a good message. We need to value those around us while we have the opportunity.



Magazine »

Read global coverage through women's eyes

Inside Congo's Growing Sisterhood

Inside Congo's Growing Sisterhood

Community »

Connect with women on the ground worldwide

PAKISTAN: They Went to School and Never Came Back

PAKISTAN: They Went to School and Never Came Back

Campaigns »

Be heard at influential forums

WWW: Women Weave the Web

WWW: Women Weave the Web

Programs »

Help us train women citizen journalists

World Pulse Voices of Our Future

World Pulse Voices of Our Future

Blog »

Read the latest from World Pulse headquarters

Announcing Our Prize Winners!

Announcing Our Prize Winners!

Partners »

Join forces with our wide network of partners

Nobel Women's Initiative

Nobel Women's Initiative