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My mother, myself

I love the photo I have posted for my profile. It was taken by a street photographer (remember them?) of my Mom (l) and me (r) from about 1970, during a happy lull in our tempestuous relationship. Me, off to class at the University of BC, she, dressed for downtown. We did that, then, of course. It went without saying, even in the days when everyone thinks we only wore body paint and long hair.

Despite the tempestuousness, it was a very deep love and from her I (eventually) learned that you could love someone unconditionally and yet be angry at them and hurt by them. And of course, get through it and past it.

I have no clue how she figured this out, but she modelled for me how it is possible to judge the behaviour, not the person, no matter how unfairly I treated her. She was the brunt of all the blame for everything that hurt me, most of it misdirected from the real source, of course. And still she stuck around and worked it out. I know this experience was the foundation on which my ability to be in relationship and work in community was built. Facilitative leadership in an apron.

I love the photo for many reasons, but I posted it as my profile image because in it SHE looks THEN like a young version of ME, as I look today. I miss her, but catch glimpses of her every time I look in the mirror.

Seems appropriate to share that sense of continuity with this community.


Rebecca's picture


Gorgeous photo of you and your mom. What a lovely tribute a week before Mother's Day (here in the US). I'm excited to see a new face on PulseWire-I hope you continue to share stories about your life!

Judi P's picture

Thanks, Rebecca

It's great to be welcomed, and somehow the story just burst forth when I was looking through my computer files for a profile picture to upload. Had no intention of taking the time RIGHT THEN to write in my new journal. The perfection gremlin was whispering in my ear.

Thanks, Mom, for using me as a conduit to tell our story. Or, at least a beginning to it.

I think she really wants me to tell the story about her girdle, and San Francisco Bay, but I'm holding off on that one. For a little while...


I loved your post. So much in fact, I started a group to celebrate mother's worldwide. I hope you'll join us in the conversation! (

Jennifer Ruwart, Chief Operating Officer, World Pulse
(Although I am part of the World Pulse team, the opinions I express on PulseWire are my own.)

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